What Stress Are We Eating Tonight?

If you live in the United States of America (or pay attention to and / or care for the people who live), you are probably not feeling so well right now. Even if you’re not the type to actually get involved in electoral politics once every four years, you probably have at least some electoral anxiety (or the possibility of electoral violence , or an ongoing pandemic, or white supremacy that exists. the very fabric of the state).

These things can make it difficult to eat or enjoy food, but food is something we must do if we want to continue to exist. Eating can also be a lifesaver, which I suspect will be very popular tonight (second only to booze and weed).

I consider myself an expert on edible escape from reality, so if you’re looking for suggestions on how to indulge your senses tonight, I have a few.

Dip and things to dip with

If you find that your eyes are glued to some kind of screen tonight (be it the big bad screen or the small bad screen), the knife and fork bargain might not be the best choice. Food that can be stuffed into your mouth along with other food (chips, bread, fried vegetables) is ideal for this scenario. That’s right, I’m – once again – a supporter of failure.

I’m not going to list every dish I like – onion sauces alone will take too many words – but I highly recommend you check out the ” ebb ” tag on this site. If I had to choose one sauce, it would probably be burnt onions (easy and tasty), although one could make a case for mashed potato sauce , bagna cauda (luxury sauce) and ramen sauce (life hacker) classic). Don’t want to mix dry seasoning with a creamy substrate? It’s okay, you can dip the chopped vegetables directly into the ramen powder . (This is called “wiping off the wet dust,” which is very good.)

Throw something in the waffle iron

I’ll be the first to admit that myWill It Waffle? the show sometimes goes into a realm of insane despair, but this is exactly the energy that tonight requires.

But tonight is not the place for waffle radicchio or bell peppers in waffles – no. You can make waffles, chicken nuggets (for your kids), frozen dumplings (for yourself), SPAM , prosciutto , honey buns , cinnamon rolls , and frozen pie buns tonight . You can roll over whole wedges of brie tonight (and then sprinkle with honey). Turn two slices of pizza into one wicked sandwich tonight. Tonight is the night for life.

Throw it in the deep fryer

I have a theory that serious chefs hate deep fryers because this is a device that was designed for those who love bags of dirt and their habits. It’s best to cook frozen foods (like pizza rolls) to a perfect crisp in a short time, but it’s also great for reheating your favorite junk food (like two-day egg rolls or fries).

If you’re looking for a “snack,” you can use your deep fryer to make a hot dog worthy of the best 7-Elevens, or you can become a true adult and make a gnocchi and meatball meal in about 10 minutes. Don’t you feel like meatballs? Just toss the gnocchi in enough oil to coat it with your favorite savory powder. I make crunchy gnocchi flavored with Caldo de Tomate (and dipping them in queso) and that damn rules.

Uh … popcorn?

Popcorn is a classic fucking meal. You have to add too much oil and then grind as many seasonings as you want to make a powder that really sticks to the inflated kernels. Need some suggestions? We have a lot of them , but for now I’m seasoning popcorn with chopped corn, nutritional yeast, and MSG. This is a great masterpiece, if I say so. (You can also sprinkle hot sauce over your bowl for a hot treat.)

Don’t forget dessert

Some people struggle with stress by getting lost in baking, but I’m not one of them. I fight stress, eat baked goods, but baking itself is not relaxing. This is why I rely heavily on boxed chocolate brownies, although I often change the vegetable oil for something more complex.

If you don’t feel like making a whole batch of brownies, you can use 1/4 cup of the mixture to make your own cake , or you can upgrade to these three-way peanut butter (or almond butter) cookies .

What are you going to push in your face tonight to calm your anxiety and calm your nerves? You will drink? Will you smoke? Are you going to scream? Let us know in the comments!

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