Tell Your Child a Bedtime Story About Their Day.
On Instagram, Erin Lochner of the Other Goose homeschooling community writes about my favorite parenting practice :
When putting the kids down, start with “Once upon a time,” and then slowly talk about the day you spent together, from the morning until now, for example: “A long time ago, Penny woke up from the sun and called her mom. , and hugged her. Then they ate banana pancakes and drummed with forks on the counter … “
This is what you may have done with your children before. It’s a silly and enjoyable activity, and you might laugh about it one day (three hours ago) when your child spilled a whole box of peanut butter puffins on the floor. But the ritual of telling your child a story about your day, every day, can also be a little powerful. As Lochner points out, evening storytelling can give children a “sense of completion” after a full day and “provide a space for communication.”
What’s more, there is a sense of calm that comes with the practice of seeing your life as history – triumphs, misses and all that. I know that thinking about myself in the third person can help me control my emotions , allowing me to be at some psychological distance from my daily crises. (“Michelle is overwhelmed, but she’s going to try to focus on one task at a time.” This is ridiculous but effective.) What if we helped our children do that too? What if we pay close attention to all the big and small ways they learn, persevere and choose kindness, and then add those details to their everyday stories that they can hear and internalize?
A bedtime story about a baby might sound something like this:
A long time ago …
… Ricky’s younger brother destroyed his Lego structure, and at first he got angry, but then he realized that kids are still learning to be careful.
… Eddie did all her business without reminders.
… Tara was nervous about the presentation of her butterfly class, but she practiced seven times in front of her parents and now remembers.
(Remember to mix the “lessons” with the more mundane details of their day – don’t overdo it.)
If you tell these stories regularly, your children can begin to see themselves as the heroes of their stories and act accordingly. They will learn that bright spots can be found any day if they look closely enough, and there is always room to change the ending. Over time, your narration will be replaced by your own inner voice.