I’m Morra Aarons-Mel, Author of Hiding in the Bathroom and This Is How I Work
According to author and hermit entrepreneur Morra Aarons-Mele, success isn’t just for extroverts. In an ambitious and challenging business area, Aarons-Mele has amassed experience in pursuing excellence without breaking herself. She told us about her “moment,” her work-from-home schedule, and the two lists she compiles twice a year.
Location : Boston, Massachusetts. Current Job: Founder of Women Online and The Mission List , author of Hiding in the Bathroom: A Roadmap to Getting Out (When You Better Stay Home) and host of the Hiding in the Bathroom podcast One word that best describes how you work : Specifically Current mobile device: iPhone 7 with my cool Bandolier wallet over my shoulder Current computer: MacBook Pro, webcam closed, for travel. Large Mac Thunderbolt screen and old Macbook Air for an ergonomic workstation at home.
First of all, tell us a little about your past and how you got where you are now.
I am a digital political consultant and have created marketing campaigns that have mobilized women online since 1999, when I helped Hillary Clinton go online for her first conversation. I was Head of Marketing for Europe’s largest online travel website and Director of Internet Marketing for the Democratic National Committee. I had a lot of jobs in both internet marketing and politics – and I gave up all of them. I was simply not suited to work in a 9-6 office or to advance my career through traditional channels. I am allergic to fluorescent lamps and I hate being around people all day! I am a very anxious introvert.
I started out as a freelancer to finish my graduate school, and I had a huh moment: I love my job as a digital marketer. I just hated the way I did it, sat in a big office all day, wade through office politics, chatted, was always on. I continued to freelance and built my own business called Women Online, with the idea that we would be the first digital marketing agency to create online campaigns that mobilize women for good.
Because my vision was to advance women, I aimed to ensure that my employees had a flexible, manageable workload that I put in front of me. We wouldn’t have an office and everyone who worked for me could have their own hours and plan their days. It would be small and profitable, meaningful and manageable.
I am a hermit entrepreneur. Over the past decade, I’ve built a life that allows me to make enough money and find enough recognition without driving myself crazy or sacrificing my stay-at-home. Of course, this lifestyle, the best of both worlds, comes at a price. This meant sacrifices, some FOMOs, less success than some colleagues, and a slower path. But this is my version of success, and I like it.
Tell us about a recent work day.
5:45 Wake up when my 3-year-old needs juice.
6: 00–7: 00 Turn on Morning Joe . Make coffee, check email and Twitter. Work on your blog post (preferably in the morning).
7: 00–7: 30 Prepare breakfast for the children.
7:30 A nanny arrives. Work in bed until 9.
9: 00-10: 00 Verification of calls from the client and the team.
10: 00-11: 00 Volunteer at my son’s school library. Make a quick call along the way.
11:00 Take a walk (alone!).
12:30 PM Stop by the grocery store to buy dinner for today.
2:00 PM Live on Facebook: Paint the top half of your face and put on a nice shirt.
2: 30–3: 30 Customer calls.
3: 30–4: 00 Children come home from school, greet and learn about their day. Make pesto for dinner and take a look in the garden. Read the newspaper and stretch.
4: 30–5: 30 Work on a proposal for a potential client.
7:45 Repeat the speech to my husband.
8: 00-9: 00 Finish your blog post by email.
9:00 Early to bed, get up at 4:45 for the flight to New York.
I check my email (and Twitter) all day on my iPhone and laptop.
What apps, gadgets or tools can’t you live without?
Boomerang for Google Apps : This allows me to work during odd hours but schedule emails to be sent during normal business hours. MailChimp for my newsletters. Libsyn for making my podcast! Shared Google calendars to manage your home and work schedule (always include both personal and work time on your calendar!)
I have deleted Facebook from my phone and I feel much calmer. This really shortens FOMO.
My favorite gadget is the electric standing table, which allows me to change position throughout the day.
How is your workplace arranged?
I have a home office with a nice large monitor and a sun lounger. I have learned to do “deep work” by lighting a Jo Malone Orange Blossom candle, so often I go from email or surfing social media to more thoughtful work!
Usually two out of three of my cats doze next to me while I work. I have migraines, so I change jobs frequently throughout the day. I love to work in bed in the morning, and then I move to my office. I have a landline phone, which is very important for me. I don’t like talking on a cell phone.
What’s your best shortcut or life hack?
I carry sneakers with me everywhere. Because I think best when I’m alone, walking, and since exercise times can be difficult, I try to walk whenever I can: waiting to meet my child, getting stuck at the airport, or getting to my destination. and from meetings in a new city. On my home days, I try to devote 60 minutes a day without entertainment or outside influence. I let my thoughts drip and even let myself get bored. This is how all my ideas and solutions are born.
Tell us about an interesting, unusual, or challenging process you have at work.
I try to stick to a schedule of “Three days of work, two days off” or vice versa. Thanks to the deliberate way of organizing my business, I can literally be at the UN one day, and the next day at home with children digging in the mud. As a consultant and sales driver for my company, I travel a lot: I need to meet with clients, propose a new business, and negotiate that will drive the business forward. Whether in Boston or another city, I try to limit this time away from home to a couple of days a week. The rest of the time I work at home from bed or in my home office in yoga pants. And every single day I take many breaks for myself and time alone, even if it’s only five minutes in a quiet room.
I reset it in six months; I am trying to figure out where I am, in work and in life (with my children, and also with my marriage!). Every business goes through periods of tension and recession, and sometimes my side projects get really intense as well. So while one of my stated goals is to be in maximum control of my time and devote a lot of time to my kids, things can go wrong.
After my book tour, I really had to reevaluate things because my kids felt a lot about my absence. On the other hand, I took too much free time last summer and really needed to attract more business!
So I do the Over / Under exercises. My friend and colleague Christine Koch is a big intention-maker, and I’ve learned a lot from her. I asked Christine about the vision she leads her life and she shared this exercise:
Take a piece of paper. Make two columns: “More” and “Less”. In each column, make a list: What more do I need? What do I want less? Take a look at the list to see which items are triggering really strong reactions. For the items that generate the strongest response, write down actions that will help move them forward or resolve them. Then visit him every six months.
Who are the people who help you achieve results, and how do you rely on them?
I have the most amazing team in Women Online. We are all adults. We don’t do drama, and since we all work virtually, we really need to keep up with the times and communicate effectively. We write, write and call each other all day. I have a wonderful assistant who manages my schedule and little things.
My nanny Jesse is probably the most important support; She takes great care of my kids, but she also helps around the house and even installed our screen doors! When I hear from people planning to work from home and skip childcare, I chuckle inside. Does not work.
I have a village where there are other working mothers who provide moral support and advice, as well as other small business owners who help me figure things out. I always text or write to someone for support and advice, often with my husband, who is great at both.
How do you keep track of what you need to do?
I have a daily routine. Every morning and evening, I write down my to-do list, both personal and professional. Then I add items to my Google Apps calendar. I rewrite lists a lot because I somehow like it to look neat. If I leave, I leave myself a voice note when inspiration or urgency comes along.
How to recharge or relax?
Ever since I called legendary workplace expert Stu Friedman during my heavy sleep, I have stopped apologizing for taking breaks during the day. This is a marathon, not a sprint. I try to take care of myself and spend time alone every day without shame because it keeps me healthy and many people depend on me. On the other hand, I can recharge in the middle of the day just by spending 30 minutes doing housework: weeding, cooking, and even doing laundry. I love the putter.
What’s your favorite side project?
My podcast. Podcasting is the greatest medium. I like to ask people questions through the microphone.
What are you reading now or what do you recommend?
I’m reading Circe , and it’s exciting. I read a lot of fiction. I read New York Timeseveryday and a lot of magazines. I never miss newsletters, from Fortune’s Broadsheet to Politico. In the non-fiction literature, we read the new book by Nilofer Merchant ” The Power of Uniqueness” and the book by Dr. Ellen Hendriksen ” How to be yourself . “
Who else would you like to see to answer these questions?
My dream is to see a truly successful corporate leader – a partner in a law firm – who works in the same way as I do. I want to see a Fortune 500 CEO working from home one day a week!
What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?
Selling is the solution to problems. Once you understand this, you don’t need to spend hours chatting, chatting, or building your personal brand. Understand what your client needs help with!
What problem are you still trying to solve?
How not to intrusively check Twitter, because it depresses me. And how to stop my brain from endlessly wandering through the to-do list. Working on your own is great, but sometimes it can feel like you have to juggle a lot.