How to Make an Elegant, Memorable Toast
Despite everything, the toast is hard to forget. It’s either the highlight of an important event or the awkward mess people have been talking about for years. Whether you’re at a wedding party or just toasting someone’s success over a fancy dinner, here’s how to serve a fancy toast and look great while doing it.
Start with a decent joke to hook your audience
After grabbing your glass, grabbing everyone’s attention, and thanking the hosts (or whoever hosted the event), you should start with a carefully curated joke. Cameron Amigo and Josh Womack, co-founders of professional anecdote writing company Laugh Staff , say it’s important to win the audience’s trust immediately . It draws the audience to your side and makes them know that laughing is okay from the start. This is vital because if you want to add more jokes to your toast, they won’t hesitate to laugh again.
Amigo and Womack also recommend adapting the joke for their audience. Don’t just google some silly jokes, think about it seriously . This joke is your first impression, so it must be accurate. However, this should be appropriate too. The video above from Toastmasters International recommends that you be careful with all your jokes. If you are 100% sure that your audience does not include children and that people in it are not so easy to offend, you can joke a little harsher. But if you are unsure, it is best to keep the toast clean and not say that you might attack someone. One bad joke is enough to break the whole toast.
Explain who you are, but don’t talk about yourself
After you’ve hooked them with a joke, Vanessa Van Edwards , professional speaker and founder of Science of People , invites you to give some background information to everyone who is listening or explain why you are making a toast. Who are you? How do you know them? Why is it so special? Remember, some of your listeners may not know you. Keep it short, but also try to create a good story for later as you explain who you are.
However, keep in mind that while it is normal and fashionable to build a relationship with a toaster, Van Edwards suggests not talking too much about yourself. In truth, no one cares about you in this situation – this is not your moment. Rob Lazebnik, the Simpsons writer , agrees , noting that your audience wants to hear who you are toast to, not your feelings, reflections, or personal accomplishments. You may be saying, but all the attention should be on the person you are toasting.
Tell a couple of relevant stories
When it comes to your stories, you need something meaningful, yet right and respectful. As tempting as it may seem, to pull out some really awkward tidbits about a couple or someone in high esteem, don’t do it. A little juggling is okay in your story, but as AskMen’s Malcolm Fraser explains , the point of the toast is to leave everyone feeling good, including those you toast and their loved ones. Now is not the time to fry, reveal secrets, or talk about someone’s dark past.
Your overall tone should be upbeat, humorous, complimentary, and emphatic to balance it . The great toast and the stories within it should fit the comedic routine and the sincere, benevolent lifestyle. Of course, Lazebnik also does not recommend overdoing it with stories :
Toasters often jump from one anecdote to the next, turning their speech into a chain of stories, frustrating listeners desperate to find M&M. Pick one theme for your subject – Shannon looks like Mona Lisa; Bob would make a great Chilean miner trapped – and he would choose a story or two that would allow you to say something funny or cute to set the topic aside.
When in doubt, choose something simple and stylish. It is always better to keep the toast short and sweet than long and humming. After all, you might not only have a toaster, but if you are at a wedding, everyone will probably want to get to the bar and the dance floor.
End with a strong “ringing”
The end of the toast, or “clink,” is the cherry on top of the sundae. He needs to be emotionally charged, tie everything you said together, and encourage the audience to raise their glasses and join you in ordering toast. Van Edwards explains that you can have a little frolic here and even thank the hosts again. She emphasizes the difference between a decent ringing and a great ringing that can be heard at a wedding:
Only OK Clink: Raise your glasses in a toast to the bride and groom and their family.
Awesome Clink: Please raise your glasses and we thank Mr. and Mrs. Jones for organizing this wonderful evening. The bride and groom wish you a long and healthy life with equally beautiful children. We love you and are very happy for you. To your health!
All of your speech is built around this stage, so don’t let the positive energy of your well-made toast slip away and turn it into a dummy. If you’re worried that you won’t succeed, make your toast ahead of time. As with any speech, practice leads to perfection .