There Is Such a Thing As “temporary” Narcissism (and How to Recognize It)

Most of us are familiar with narcissism , whether we have had personal experiences with a narcissist or someone close to us. Working with a narcissist – be it a parent-child relationship, a long-term partnership, or a professional relationship – can have a number of devastating consequences , including anxiety, depression, and devastated self-esteem.

Narcissism in the classical sense is difficult to treat. However, Carrie Barron , MD, who is director of creativity in sustainability at the Dell School of Medicine at the University of Texas at Austin, argues that some people may return to a temporary narcissistic state after having experienced a major life event that destroys them. feeling of well-being. myself.

As Barron wrote recently in a series of articles Psychology Today: «Sometimes reality becomes unbearable, and vulnerable person falls into what has been described as secondary narcissism.”

Extreme coping mechanisms can be very reminiscent of narcissism

This can take the form of someone withdrawing from their friends and family after a serious setback, neglecting many of their responsibilities in the process, or someone who retreats into a fantasy world to the detriment of the people who depend on them, due to feelings of hopelessness caused by something. happening in their lives. This is what Barron calls ” reactive temporary narcissism .”

Narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by exaggerated self-esteem, a constant need for admiration and attention, and a lack of empathy for others. Many narcissists often deal with this by plunging into grandiose fantasies as a way of complacency when the real world doesn’t provide them with the flattery they crave. But there are many common characteristics between a person with narcissistic personality disorder and someone who retreats to narcissistic behavior as a way to cope with a crisis, and some subtle differences.

“Fantasies can have a slightly different quality if they are a form of self-healing in times of crisis as opposed to being a permanent part of the everyday false-self image,” Barron said in an email to Lifehacker.

Reactive transient narcissism responds better to treatment

While this is certainly an extreme copying behavior that can be difficult for a person’s friends and family, there is hope as it is a type of narcissism that can be both temporary and treatable.

“[He] would like to find out what the person was like before being exposed to a severe stressor, what the stressor meant to them, and how responsive and flexible they are in therapy,” Barron said in an email to Lifehacker.

In other words, if a person is able to recognize that their coping mechanisms are maladaptive and detrimental to the people they care about, and are willing to do their best to develop healthier behaviors, they will be able to change.

“Patience, compassion, and slow withdrawal from treatment are paramount, ” Barron said .