How to Stop Your “emotional Spending”
Do you sometimes spend money when you feel stressed, depressed, anxious or bored? This “emotional spending” is often impulsive and does not align with your financial goals.
Financial therapist Lindsey Bryan-Podvin says that rather than suppressing these feelings or living in denial, it’s smarter to recognize these underlying emotions, get comfortable with them, and find other ways to meet those emotional needs.
How to stop your emotional spending
Bryan-Podvin looks at this from a clinical perspective. She says that when we shop, four main “happy hormones” are released: oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin and endorphins. So if you’re struggling with emotional spending, it might be worth thinking about how else you can meet needs that are currently met by spending money.
For example, let’s look at oxytocin, the “love hormone.” Perhaps you go shopping when you feel lonely. But how else can you satisfy your need for communication? Before you start spending money on material things, consider calling According to Harvard Medical School, physical touch, if available to you, is a sure-fire way to get a boost of oxytocin. Doing yoga, getting a massage, and spending time with your pet are all good ideas. Brian Podvin says you can even look through old photos on Instagram. We’re not saying it’s always useful, but at least it’s free.
Now let’s turn to serotonin, a mood stabilizer. Serotonin is responsible for well-being and happiness. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, shaky and off-balance, what else can help you feel stable? Some ideas from Brian-Podvin and the Cleveland Clinic include taking a walk, cooking, meditating, or re-watching one of your comfort shows.
Dopamine is a pleasure hormone that plays a motivational role in the brain’s reward system. If you’re looking for something shiny and new, consider taking up a new hobby or going with a friend somewhere you’ve never been. As with the examples above, think about what gives you pleasure: good food? Do you have a massage? People watching in the park? There are many things to try before turning to retail therapy immediately.
Finally, endorphins primarily help cope with stress and reduce the feeling of pain. You get them from a sense of accomplishment. Exercise is probably the most commonly cited way to stimulate endorphin production. So instead of buying another motivation journal, consider going for a longer walk or run than usual—anything to push yourself, even a little.
Bottom line
The takeaway here is not a science lesson, but to actively notice the emotions you feel. Once you do this, you can make a conscious decision about whether spending will truly fill that void. (Hint: probably not.)
Stay self-aware and take initiative to break the cycle of emotional spending. Focus on activities and goals that will truly bring long-term happiness and financial health. Your wallet and overall well-being will thank you.