How to Protect Your Teen From the Harmful Effects of Social Media

Titled ” Social Media and Youth Mental Health ,” the new US Surgeon General’s Advice explores how social media is changing teens’ brains and impairing their social skills. These frightening findings may leave you in a panic, and you may wonder if you should remove the Internet from your home. While you know that social media bans are unlikely to keep your child away from them and may actually make them want to be online more, you still want to help mitigate those negative effects. Media, youth and mental health experts discuss how best to navigate these challenging waters.

What does the report actually say?

As the name suggests, all social media is evil, but don’t panic just yet. “When parents and caregivers see the scary headlines that result from posts like this, it’s easy to jump to the conclusion that social media is automatically very harmful to kids,” says developmental psychologist Tia Kim, vice president of education, research and influence at the Committee . . for Children , a global non-profit organization supporting the social and emotional well-being of more than 26.9 million children each year. However, this is not what the advisory report says.

“This suggests that while there is strong evidence or ‘trends’ that social media can be potentially harmful,” Kim says, “researchers have yet to learn much more.”

You may have heard of these trends or issues , some of which can seriously harm children. The report also shows an association with high social media use and poor mental health.

“Young people who checked their social media platforms more often were more sensitive to general social rewards and punishments,” says Stephanie Marcello, chief psychologist at Rutgers University’s Center for Behavioral Health. “Essentially, they saw changes in the brain that became more sensitive to social feedback. This continues to have an impact on how the brain develops in adulthood.” (She cites a study that found these associations.)

How social media is changing children’s brains

Children’s brains are constantly and rapidly developing . During puberty, says Marcello, “the brain undergoes dramatic developmental changes,” including “areas of the brain associated with a desire for peer attention become increasingly sensitive .” She says this desire for attention is exactly what can be exploited on social media. Combined with underdeveloped self-control, “it all points to how vulnerable the adolescent brain is.”

Kim explains how these brain changes translate into ways to interact with the world throughout life.

“Both positive and negative experiences help shape parts of the teen brain, as well as teen well-being,” she says. Since children believe that both virtual and real life experiences are equally important, their social skills can be severely affected by the misuse of social media. “One of the biggest ways that social media can negatively impact children’s social-emotional skills is by suppressing their actual social skills,” says Kim, which translates to “a distorted perception of the real world.”

Marcello says children’s virtual social experiences affect social skills because because they don’t actually happen in real time, “kids are essentially deprived of the opportunity to learn and practice all those skills,” such as non-verbal social cues. All this leads to depression , and, according to Marcello, increases the likelihood of anxiety in social and future relationships in the workplace.

What should parents do?

Banning social media is unlikely to help, as children will have access to their friends’ media and may find ways to steal or hide social media use. While you can’t look over your child’s shoulder all the time, Marcello says: “Caregivers and parents should keep a close eye on their children’s social media feed in early adolescence, especially around the age of 10-14” and “should be on the lookout to try to minimize or stop harmful content that their child is exposed to,” such as topics related to racism and suicide or promoting bullying. Try to create a homely environment where your child can talk to you about what they see online and whether it’s inappropriate.

Kim advises involving children in the decision-making process about setting screen time limits. “For example, you could ask your teen how they perceive their relationship with social media, and then ask them what decisions they would like to implement to maintain a positive relationship with social media,” she says. By making them active participants in setting boundaries, Kim says restrictions will feel less like punishment.

Marcello also says it’s important to model proper social media use and limit time spent on the phone, especially in the presence of children. You can also use your own social media to start a conversation about the difference between real life and the cyberverse.

“When our familiar families post images or stories that may not be entirely realistic,” says Kim, it opens the door to such conversations because they can compare what they know about a person’s life with what they want to show. .

Encourage your child to have positive social interactions in the real world. Marcello suggests focusing on finding “things they’re interested in outside of technology” like sports, music, and “anything that sparks their interest and gives them confidence.” She says the focus should not be on how they look, but on what they do. It is also important to integrate skills at home that will help children make good decisions online.

“The easiest way parents can help mitigate these possible harmful effects on teens is to double down on teaching kids skills like self-awareness to understand how they appear on social media should reflect their values, self-discipline to establish healthy social media restrictions. consumption and responsible decision making to be a good digital citizen and report things like cyberbullying,” says Kim.

These skills will help not only in social networks, but also in real life.