How to Survive a Mass Shooting, According to the FBI
There were over 200 mass shootings in the US in 2023 , according to the non-profit agency Gun Violence Archive, and that’s only May. Guns have been the leading killer of American children and teens for several years, beating out car accidents, COVID, cancer and hours of drag queen stories.
Obviously there is no way to prevent these deaths but people are still trying. Some believe that limiting the number of guns in a country could result in fewer gun deaths, while others suggest that we need more guns so that we can shoot. I wonder who is right ?
Regardless of how you feel about gun control, we will all have to live with this nightmare until we come to a reasonable solution. I’m guessing this will take at least a month, but for now let’s see what the FBI has to say about this. The Federal Bureau of Investigation recently published a solid guide on how to survive an active shooter situation, and its efforts included the creation of Run. Hide. Fight.” useful public service announcement/educational video that goes viral as we speak. This information could save your life . Anything is possible, right?
An active shooting response to ordinary victims – I mean “citizens”.
“You can survive a mass shooting if you’re prepared for it,” says the FBI, and the preparation is as simple as one, two, three – run, hide, fight.
The video is a belive-style dramatization that begins with a young couple in a bar, which I assume is a first date. Their evening is interrupted by a mass shooter breaking into the area and opening fire, giving Ellen and Gary (that’s what I call them) the chance to grow as characters through adversity.
Run: just get out of there
We’ve never seen the shooter, so I’m guessing he’s a member of a group I don’t like, but we see what happens to the bar’s patrons when (I assume) an AR-15 fires – everyone runs. According to the FBI, this is a good plan. As the waitress fleeing chaos and death says, “Running makes you less vulnerable and increases your chances of survival.”
If you want to reduce the chance of getting killed at the local saloon, you should note the location of all exits upon arrival. Do it everywhere you go; it’s not weird.
When the shooting starts, don’t hesitate. Leave your things and run as fast as you can. The FBI notes that you should evacuate away from your attacker. Oh, away from the gunfire. It’s clear.
If you manage to get to the waiting cops, keep your hands up and follow their instructions. You don’t want good guys with guns to shoot you. For them, it’s a lot of paperwork.
Hide: Your Guide to Effective Sneaking
According to the FBI, you need to determine if the path will lead you into a direct line of fire, because you are a kind of combat tactician. If so, don’t worry; you still have options that can help you survive. You can run into the office with other scared strangers, lock and barricade the door like Ellen does in the video. She is so resourceful. I understand why Gary likes her.
While you’re there, form a tribe with the others. Appoint a leader and create a representative government. Vote for gun control and ban firearms within the break room. Problem solved.
Also: try to help those riddled with bullets by applying direct pressure to the wounds and applying tourniquets as needed. You would be great at this because you have experience as a field medic in war zones or as a high school student from Texas .
Don’t forget to turn off your phones (don’t call your loved ones for the last time!) and “make a protection plan.” Take a lamp or fire extinguisher as shown in the video because it will work. If the fire extinguisher develops feelings for you, politely but firmly explain that you are not interested.
Combat: Bringing Nothing to the Gunfight
The video continues to dramatize the plight of Gary and two other guys hiding behind the bar who can neither leave nor reach the break room. In this case, the FBI suggests using homemade weapons and using “teamwork and surprise.” This, again, will totally work!
“I am not a victim. I’m ready for it,” says Gary. “If we control the weapon, we control the shooter. I’ll go for a gun; he will go for weapons; the bartender will go for the head.”
Unlike the heroic protagonist, I’m not ready for this. While the FBI doesn’t give specific advice to me and the other cowards, the point of view and Gary speaking directly to the camera suggest that the spectator is the fourth person behind the counter, so I can only assume that the best move is to offer moral support by saying, “Good plan.” , Guys! Go there and destroy the heavily armed lunatic!
Blame and recriminations
Once the shooting is over, you can find your girlfriend outside and give her a hug. Nothing spices up a Tinder date quite like getting close due to a mass shooting. The wedding scene is saved for the FBI sequel How to Survive When a Jealous Guy with a Fire Extinguisher Shoots at Your Wedding.
The FBI video is irrelevant to the aftermath of the shooting, but what you do after the smoke clears is also important. Remember to offer thoughts and prayers to the victims and make sure no one is politicizing the event.
Within days of a mass shooting, determine if the shooter is a terrorist, a gang member, or a mentally ill person. Then see if they might have political views you don’t like so you can argue about it more effectively online.
How to survive boring non-mass shooting
With all the excitement about mass shootings, it’s easy to forget about the old school of non-mass gun deaths. On average , 316 people are shot every day in the US. Of these, 54% are suicides, 43% are murders, and about 1% are accidents.
It’s harder to make videos on how to prevent such deaths, so if you’re about to be killed, just consider your life a small price to pay so other people can enjoy hunting, target shooting, and open-carrying in the Waffle. House.
Mass shootings and children
If you are concerned that your children are being killed in schools, don’t worry. Not only are your kids better at using iPads than you are, they know better than you how to navigate mass shootings thanks to their years of training. School shooting drills are held in approximately 95% of American public schools , sometimes in the form of simulated mass shootings with gunfights and fake blood . You have to appreciate the entertainment.
We don’t have conclusive evidence that these programs are effective and they may cause unnecessary injury, but like making a video on how to survive a mass shooting, school shooting drills are simple and make you want to do something, only without “do” part. Isn’t that the point here?
This article has been updated since it was published to correct the error. 316 people are shot every day in the US; the original version stated that 316 people died every day as a result of shootings.