A Guide to Child Culture for Adults Out of Touch With Reality: What Is “Corecore” and Why Does It Upset Me so Much?

In this week’s children’s report, the children of post-universal America look at the world we’ve built for them and come up with a verdict. Spoiler alert: It’s not super positive. Fortunately, the development of Taser flying robots is proceeding at a rapid pace; I hope they will soon be sent to the schools of our country to offer a powerful moral uplift.

Drone robots with stun guns will come to schools

I’ve seen the future of school safety and it ‘s amazing . Scottsdale, Ariz., the sinisterly moniker Axom Enterprises is hard at work developing remote-controlled school security drones equipped with tasers capable of “disabling an active shooter in less than 60 seconds.” Nothing makes children feel safer than walking past an army of armed flying robots to school, ready to electrocute them if they cross the threshold.

In a report on the drone development program, Axon’s Ethics Council recommended that the company “never release drones with autonomous weapons” and expressed concern that Taser robots could be used more actively in black, brown and other marginalized communities. (You think ??), so maybe the company should listen to themselves and stop trying to do this crazy thing? Axom responded essentially, “Thanks for all the work, guys! But we’re still going to make killer robots for schools.” Not surprisingly, nine of the 12 ethics council members have since resigned . Obviously, these latte lovers don’t want to live in a 1990s sci-fi movie that’s going straight to DVD.

What is “corcor” and why does it upset me so much?

Trendy TikTokers and heavy metal fans alike love their “core” – there’s cottagecore, deathcore, normcore, hardcore, etc. The new thing is “corcore”. It’s a little hard to pin down, but from an outsider’s perspective, it seems like it’s made up of videos mixing bits of tech media to comment on the isolation and alienation we all experience in this boring dystopia. Corecore are smart, depressed kids who ask, ” How did we even get here ?” This is to 2023 what OK Computer Radiohead is to 1997. That is: it’s grim , but also vaguely reassuring, because at least some young people refuse to swallow anything they’re served. Some of these videos are pure alienation, so strong that it will stop you , or at least make you call your mom or something. If this sounds like your thing, check out the hashtag . It’s cruel, but addictive.

Generation Z workers look at office culture and discover what it lacks

Speaking of young people noticing the absurdity of pre-collapse America, the young office drones (human species) who entered the workforce during the years when “everyone works from home because no one wants to get the plague” are asked to come into the office, and A lot of people don’t like it, to put it mildly. This video from TikTokers Phil & Daw says it all in 11 seconds. Many employers are asking their employees to return to work “for the culture” (definitely not because they signed a lease on an expensive office space!), and this video shows you what “culture” is all about. It’s ruthless. Commentators lash out with their own observations, such as: “Culture: a ping-pong table that we can’t use because people are working and it’s in the middle of the office” and “The best thing is to drive 45 minutes one way to have Zoom meetings” and “You can just feel the creative energy and spontaneous exchanges that drive innovation!”

Why don’t young people drink?

You would think that all this alienation would lead to alcoholism, but no: Gen-Z just doesn’t drink as much as previous generations. Americans drink less overall , but the decline is most noticeable among younger people. The number of college-aged people who do not drink alcohol has jumped from 20% to 28% over the past ten years.

While some attribute the drop to financial hardship, I think it’s more likely that younger people aren’t as frivolous as older adults—other risk behaviors like drug use, smoking, and crime are also on the decline in younger people. Of course, in high school, all I did was drink, plan to get alcohol and drink some more. The only good thing was that by the time I got to college, I was drinking heavily. I think young people are smart enough to skip the whole “drink ’til you’re tired” step.

Viral video of the week: “Waffle house found a new owner” explained

Enough seriousness! Let’s take a look at a harmless troll out of control. This week’s viral video is about the very concept of virality. Have you noticed that the phrase “Waffle House found a new owner” randomly appears on message boards and comment sections lately? I saw it once and thought, “Weird.” Then I saw it appear in the comments of three different YouTube videos and I got curious. After extensive research (consisting of googling), I traced the phrase back to YouTuber Johnny RaZeR Shortsm and determined that the phrase itself means nothing – by design. Mr. RaZeR Shorts and his followers were playing pranks. The idea was that everyone in the super-secret club should post a vaguely ominous phrase in every comment section starting January 31st. Then, after a couple of days, everyone will delete the comments, leaving behind nothing but a secret. But according to RaZer Shorts, it worked too well. No one waited until the 31st and it became more popular than he expected. Here is the RaZeR Shorts video that explains everything in detail .

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