How to Help New People at the Gym Without Being Condescending
New Year, same old, but now your gym is full of people discovering fitness for the first time. Some of them will be gone by February, that’s true. But for others, it’s the start of a lifelong journey, or at least a solid long-term habit. Here are ways to help them without looking rude or scaring them off.
Literally just hello
For many newcomers to the gym, the whole situation is intimidating. They think that everyone else is imbued with some kind of dumb culture, they are stronger than them and silently evaluate their every move.
Their delusions are not your problem, but hey, you want to help. If this is a place where the patrons know each other’s names, introduce yourself. If not, at least give a friendly smile and nod when you cross paths. A friendly greeting can go a long way to what it’s like to be a new person.
Notice when they look confused
You can spot a noob by the way he lifts the weight, but he likely has everything on his mind except the exercise: where do I put my stuff? Where can I find 2.5 pound plates? How do I put on this dip belt?
So instead of only noticing people when they’re exercising, pay attention to people wandering around with confused expressions. For example, if they’re hanging out next to the car you’re using, ask if they’d like to work and be prepared to show them the lever that adjusts the seat.
Say, “Can I give you advice on this?”
If you notice that someone is doing something wrong—or making it harder than it should be—you can offer to help. But this is the key: the sentence .
I will never forget the kind stranger who saw me trying to load a disc onto a deadlift when I was a beginner. (These suckers are not easy to put on.) I was already embarrassed by the thought that a bunch of tough guys behind me were probably laughing or rolling their eyes. I was afraid that I wouldn’t figure it out, but I was also afraid that someone would come up and tell me that I was an idiot because I didn’t know how to do it.
But then this man came up and said, “May I give you advice on this?” Yes of course. So he showed me how and then made me do it to make sure I could do it myself. It was all I needed and I have since paid for the service up front.
Offer to find them on the bench
If someone is lifting a difficult weight on the bench press and they don’t have a buddy around, ask (after the current set) if they want a seat. Or, if you notice someone loitering around the benches, almost looking into people’s eyes, there’s a good chance they want to sit down but don’t know how to ask someone to notice them.
While they can always drag a bench into a squat rack , this is hard to do when the gym is full. We have a guide to the dialogue between the insurer and the lifter here ; guide your new friend through the process by saying how many reps they are going to do and what kind of help they would like.
Volunteer to answer questions
In addition to giving hints now, another way you can be helpful is to offer answers to questions in the future. This is a good way to approach someone who is doing an exercise in what you consider to be poor form. (In general, we advise against correcting the shape of people unless they ask you to . You are not necessarily an expert in what they should be doing.)
But many beginners secretly wish that someone would give them some advice. They also tend to be unsure who they can ask and if it’s okay to ask.
So if you want to be that person, start by saying something friendly or encouraging between sets. If they say something about you being new to squats (or something like that), you can say, “Oh yes, I love squats, do them all the time. If you need any guidance, just let me know.” Some people will politely thank you but never ask. Others will immediately want to know if you can watch them squat and tell them what they are doing wrong. It is up to you to decide how much time you spend on your own training to help a new person. But chances are they’ll appreciate the offer, and you might even make a new friend at the gym.