Put the Turkey in the Punch Bowl

Holiday parties aren’t complete without snacks, music, and festive drinks. (Oh, and friends too, but back to the drinks.) Choosing the best holiday drink is important for seasonal fun, but so is the equipment. It has always annoyed me how ladles leave behind a good half inch of quality liquor at the bottom of flat-bottomed punch bowls, slow cookers, and broilers. Let’s stop this nonsense. It’s time to say goodbye to the ladles and say hello to the turkeys.

As attractive as drunken friends are, they have questionable motor skills. If they see that last inch of cranberry punch, but every time they scoop it’s like pouring water out of a Horcrux bowl, they’re sure to take matters into their own hands. Lifting a giant glass container, or worse, a 16-pound roaster with hot cider inside, is a terrible way to pour a drink. And here the turkey buster comes to the rescue. The pointed end of the tassel fits right into the very bottom edge of any container you use. Guests don’t have to tilt or lift the bowl, and generally everyone has used such a drip tool before, so they should be able to handle it even if the room rotates a bit.

In particular, non-drip turkey spread works best if you have a couple. I use this non-drip nozzle , which comes with a contra-angle, replacement tip, and cleaning brush. The contra-angle has a tiny silicone pad inside that helps stop drops until you squeeze the end of the balloon. Buster can also help some heavy-handed guests portion the drink. The average turkey pot sucks up one and a half to two ounces of liquid at a time, so two dips in the pool is a solid amount for a hard drink with ice.

Since they were originally designed to pump boiling turkey juice, the busters don’t get hot, so you can use them for hot glegg, mulled wine, or hot apple cider. Simply place the spoon in a punch bowl or other large cocktail container and keep all of the ladles out of sight. If the pot has a lid or you think your guests will be confused, stick a piece of sticky tape on the side of the balloon and write something helpful like “use me to pour drinks” or “pouring mulled wine.” Engineering modeling can also help get things moving. Once a few people see you doing it, they’ll be very excited to try it. Place a tall glass or spoon stand nearby to hold the spoon and give it support for the night.


Leave a Reply