A Guide to Children’s Culture for Adults Out of Touch With Reality: Is Halsey an Industrial Enterprise?
I don’t know about you, but I’m starting to think that every single person on earth, constantly connected to a source of endless unverified information, may not actually be the best route to a healthy, productive society. My evidence this week: music industry factories, wacky new slang, broken Disney hacks, and some truly vile political slander.
Halsey refuses to be an “industrial enterprise”
The record industry using cheap gimmicks to achieve success and sell produced music is not new, but the practice is reaching never-before-seen heights of ludicrousness on TikTok. Singer Halsey recently gave an example: in a viral video , she says , “I have a song that I like and I want to release it as soon as possible. But my record label won’t let me… I’ve sold over 165 million records and my record company says I can’t release it unless they can fake a viral tiktok moment.”
Thanks to posts like Halsey (and common sense), kids are starting to understand what trumped up attempts at online virality are, and have adopted the term ” industry factory ” for artists who pretend to be mainstream but are actually backed by the record industry. . Of course, fake authenticity in music is nothing new, but incidents like singer Leah Keith (arguably) faking boyfriend drama to get plays for a (simply awful) song are becoming more and more frequent. And when it doesn’t work, it’s so embarrassing; consider the case of the “punk band” Tramp Stamps, who weren’t fooling anyone .
Transphobic internet rumor reaches Congress
A distinctly darker strain of engineered virality is seeping through the Internet, and if you haven’t already decided that computers in general should be thrown into a volcano, this story may change your mind. The day after the tragic mass shooting in Uvalde, Texas, transphobic online disinformation was so widespread and accepted among the right that U.S. Rep. Paul Gosar of Arizona tweeted about it. Now, a deleted tweet by Gosar puts the blame for the shooting on a “transgender left-wing illegal”, although there is literally no evidence for any of those claims.
The shooter lie appears to have originated on the 4chan internet cesspool, where unnamed users reportedly blamed the massacre on a specific Reddit user (who had nothing to do with it). This anonymous message board post for trolls came up. up slimy virtual tubes leading to Washington, D.C., where it was distributed by a congressman . It’s mind-blowing that hate posts from 4chan nerds are affecting the minds of the most powerful people in the world in real time, and we’re all just walking around like it’s not the End of Days. I hope that the younger generation understands these things better than we do.
Slang watches: what do “okki” and “poggers” mean?
Below are two new slang words that you are definitely too old to use in conversation.
- Okky : This versatile slang word can mean a lot of things, but is most commonly used as an adjective to describe someone who is acting strange or awkward. Its popularity has spread thanks to Brooklyn wine cellar owners serving “The Oky Way” sandwiches, as you can see in this video . The word “ok” is old slang that means something like “dude” or “man” and is used to say something like “yo, ok. How are you?” (At least it was when I was in high school in New Jersey.)
- Poggers : This is an exclamation of joy used among gamers and other online communities. It’s like “wow” or “cool”, like “Poggers! I have a prom date!” It comes from the name of the Twitch emoji and looks like it’s mostly typed rather than spoken aloud. At least I hope so, because “bastards?” Seriously?
Disney closes loophole in loose shirt
Almost a year ago, Disney fan and genius Amanda DiMeo posted her life hack for getting free T-shirts at the Disney park : show up in a shirt that shows small breasts and the park will give you a free shirt as cover. Sneaky, but DiMeo says she got a $75 T-shirt for free, so spectacular. Other guests said that they followed her example and also received a gift.
Well, the party’s over, folks. Perhaps too many people have tried this, but for some reason, it seems like Disney no longer gives out clothes to guests who break the dress code. According to the Disney fan site Insidethemagic , two recent attempts to get free gear from Mickey failed and both park goers were told to either buy the shirt themselves or hit the road.
Viral video of the week: I tried to make money on the arcade
In a viral video this week, YouTuber Drew Gooden answers a question that’s been on my mind for a long time: Is it possible to make a profit from slot machines ? Can you work so well with a machine that dispenses tickets that the prize won is worth more than the tokens spent?
Personally, every time I go to an arcade with prizes, I start by looking at a lava lamp that costs 6,400 tickets, spend $87, and walk away with a pair of Groucho and Abba Zabba glasses, but Gooden is more committed to the ticket-stingy lifestyle than me and he does it seriously. I won’t spoil the dramatic question at the center of the video; watch him to see how he comes out. As a bonus, you’ll also find out if the hot dog toaster is worth the tickets you spend on it. (Spoiler: it’s not.)