How to Complain About Bad Service Without Being an Asshole

Have you ever had a bad meal in a restaurant and then ate it anyway? Have you ever told a stylist that you love your new highlights , even when you were mentally figuring out if you could afford an immediate color correction at another salon? You may think that in such situations you are just polite, but in fact you are not; no service technician should think they did a great job if they didn’t. You leave unsatisfied and will probably spend more money elsewhere while they, the trained professionals, may continue to serve their future customers poorly. Lose-lose.

However, there is a tactful way to say that you are unhappy and would like to either redo it or get your money back. You don’t have to be an asshole, but you do have to get something you like in exchange for your money.

Why talk about bad service?

A professional or expert who truly cares about their craft wants feedback, even if it’s not necessarily positive. Hearing about your experience, they will understand what they are doing well and what can be done better.

“With my clients, whom I adore, I personally take the first step and let them know that if they ever want to make any changes, always let me know,” said Kelsey Wheeler, New York-based hairdresser . “For me, as a colorist, it is important that everyone likes their result. If I were a client I would like to be honest, so transparency is always welcome and appreciated as a colorist.”

This approach was supported by Dr. Alexis Parcells , board-certified plastic surgeon: “For all first time patients, I highly recommend that they contact me or the team for Botox and fillers in two weeks. she said, explaining that opening these lines of communication “makes the client or patient more available to express concern or dissatisfaction.”

Andrew Young, a restaurant owner in New England, agreed, adding: “If someone on my line is undercooking something, I need to know about it. They don’t have to tell me if they don’t like what they ordered, but I do need to know if the quality is being controlled.”

How can you effectively and beautifully frame your complaint?

Obviously, don’t get mad and don’t be demanding. Remember that all people and professionals who offer services to you try hard, even if they fail from time to time. Take a moment to calm down if you’re upset, and don’t forget that you’ve probably made a few mistakes at work too .

File a complaint with the person in charge, be it a beautician, chef or other professional involved. Be specific in your question as well, and don’t feel the need to use overly florid language or be overly expansive in praising parts you enjoy.

“I would like to know that something is actually wrong with the dish,” Young said, citing undercooked chicken as an example. “If time is busy, I want someone to just get down to business. I want to fix the error and get past it. I’d rather have someone speak up but make it clear what the problem is than be dissatisfied and give a bad review without giving us a chance to fix it.”

Parcells noted that if you are afraid or even angry and do not want to communicate your concerns to the professional who has done you the favor, “you should probably find someone else who you trust and can have an open dialogue with.” She also noted that many practices and businesses these days have text portals, email addresses, or other technological communication options that can help you communicate your concerns directly to the people in charge without the need for awkward face-to-face meetings. . Take some time to write a detailed, respectful message, but only after you’ve cooled off.

Young also added that there’s a difference between not liking something and actually making a mistake, but even if the customer is just picky, they’d rather know.

“The more beautiful, the better. If they’re really good, I’ll probably fix it even if it’s on them because I want customers to have a good experience. If they’re assholes, then it’s on them,” he said.

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