Avoid These Dating App Cliches so You Can Actually Find a Match
Although dating apps have become a staple of modern life over the last decade or so, they have always been a bit difficult to use. Some people treat apps like a game of first dates and speed dating, while others swipe for love and connection. It is difficult to understand that a person is on the other side of this “coincidence!” the screen wants, and if it is consistent with what you need, so most people have developed conscious and unconscious screening methods to weed out potential partners faster.
One of the easiest ways to instantly spot someone you should swipe left is to notice the dating app cliché in their bio. Someone with a link to “The Office ” or just jotted down that they’re looking for “adventure” gets through easily most of the time. If you don’t want to end up on the bench before you even start playing, here’s how to avoid using clichés in your profile.
Spend time building your dating profile
If you really want to use your profile to find a mate, or at least a connection that you have something in common with, you’ll have to put in some effort. For example, complete all clues.
Bumble shared data with Lifehacker that showed that as of February of this year, those who “make the most of their profile” can see a 30% increase in matches. A spokesperson for the app said: “It takes a lot of courage to make a name for yourself when you’re starting out, and it’s often more convenient to stick to popular links that can be understood by a lot of people, plus people want to connect. with those who share common ground with them. But at Bumble, we encourage you to provide specific examples or anecdotes that show what makes you different. Your Bumble profile bio is your opportunity to show off your personality and help a potential partner get to know you a little.”
Ask a question on your profile that a possible match could answer, or explicitly state what types of cooking you like to do. If you try to share details about yourself instead of quoting an old Game of Thrones quote, it will make you stand out from the crowd.
“We don’t blame you if you’re a fan of pop culture and movies – in fact, judging by those who adopted Bumble Interest Badges in 2021, one of the top interest categories worldwide was Films and TV,” he added. representative. . “However, instead of referring to a popular TV show or movie, there is something special about referring to an independent film and matching it to someone who understands it too.”
Laurel House, relationship expert at eharmony, added: “Years ago, profiles were meant to be liked. They were fun, flirtatious and flat. They lacked depth, truth, authenticity and vulnerability. Today people are looking for the real. In order to attract the real one, you need to first show yourself to be the real one, and that starts on your profile. Witnesses are now putting time and effort into their profile so that it really gives an idea of who is behind the words. In a very brief description, summer residents make more efforts to highlight who they really are – their sympathies, lifestyle, life aspirations.
Describe your traits in detail
Melissa Hobely, OkCupid’s dating coach and chief marketing officer, said that while dating profiles have gotten simpler in recent years, there’s one thing that hasn’t changed: clichés still exist.
“Please try to avoid dating profile clichés. I completely understand why this is happening – completing your dating profile is difficult . Trust me, no one knows what to say,” she said, “but after seeing thousands of profiles on OkCupid, I can tell you that cliches suck.” She said that if you use it, you’re less likely to get the right gesture or like because clichés are boring, don’t tell anyone anything about you, and are predictable. They even assume that you are lazy. Dating has definitely been modernized in the app age, but one constant that has persisted through the ages is that any potential partner wants to give the impression that you’ll put in some effort to woo them. If you use a catchphrase, you are not at all signaling that you will dazzle them with your first date, let alone continue the effort when you get together.
She suggested that instead of writing down that you are “laid-back”, you could expand on that quality a bit. She said she recently saw a profile that said, “I used to have a very stressful job on Wall Street, but I realized it didn’t make me happy, and now I’m working full-time for a non-profit organization working to abolish death penalty. “. Of course, one could argue that the struggle for the lives of prisoners is more intense than working in the financial sector, but that’s the point: it’s debatable . For example, in private messages. “I’m laid-back” doesn’t give the potential partner anything to respond to. However, a detailed description of how laid-back you are makes a difference.
If your profile says you’re “laid-back, easy-going and fun,” she said, it won’t generate much interest. In the wise words of Hobely: “Okay, not shit. Who doesn’t?
She said if you’re having a hard time coming up with something detailed about yourself, go back to the list format that “has become quite popular on OkCupid” but the reason is “it works.”
“When you list places, shows, books, music, etc., you are specific about what you like,” she said. “You also give other people the opportunity to ask about it – maybe you both love this obscure Swedish band Sounds.”
Stop using these clichés right now
If your profile says you’re looking for Pam for your Jim, open the app now. Delete it. Get rid of it. Stop this. If it says, “I’m new here,” remove it. Do you like to laugh? Join the club, baby, and take it out. If your profile says you’re looking for “adventure” or “partner in crime”, it’s best to specify what that means. A trip to a useless restaurant you saw on TikTok is not an “adventure”. In your photo, you are wearing a Patagonia vest over a button-down shirt and says you work in finance. We all know that “adventure” here means, for example, a drink on Sunday. Enough. Just say that you like ordering a beer to end the weekend. And stop listing your height and ending with the phrase “because it seems to be important.” Why are you so defensive? Your attitude radiates more disgusting vibrations than your height.
“Yes, please put up with the fact that I’m looking for an adventure girl,” Hobely said. “Is this the code for ‘communication’? Just say it. I’d like to retire: “Work hard, play hard” and “No assholes.”
“If you have to say it, then it’s a bad start.”
If House had gotten his way, the phrase “seeking my partner in crime” would also be retired. “What does this even mean? Are you looking for a partner for life? Are you looking for a partner to have fun? I have many clients who immediately delete people if their profile says that they are looking for an accomplice. It’s time to be more specific, because that the reality is that a partner has a different meaning for everyone.”
She’s also not a fan of “seeking my other half,” which she says is “another immediate twist.”
“Although I appreciate the feeling – that you are looking for your “person”, calling him your “soulmate”, but are you saying that you are not whole? she asked. “Are you reporting that without a partner you are an inferior person? Clarity is key, especially in this day and age more than ever.”
It’s true: ehharmony recently released the results of its fifth annual Happiness Index survey for the year, which found that 51% of single people prioritize spending time alone after lockdown, 55% prioritize self-care, and 30% prioritize priority by saying no to social invitations. If you want to get the attention of a group of newly independent single people, you need to give them a reason to swing right at you.