What Not to Say When Buying or Selling a House

While buying or selling a home can bring up a lot of personal feelings, it is ultimately a business transaction and it is best to keep your cards to yourself. Expressing every thought you have or giving every detail about your situation can backfire, making you less competitive, compromising your leverage, or losing a sale entirely.

Here are a few things to keep in mind when buying or selling a home.

You are in a hurry

A sense of urgency tells potential buyers that you might be willing to accept any offer to close the deal, or lets sellers know they can negotiate a counteroffer in their favor. Don’t tell the other side that things have to happen quickly, unless you’re willing to close the deal on potentially less favorable terms.

You may also choose not to disclose personal information that indicates urgency, including that you are moving due to a divorce, serious illness, or financial problems.

You are in no rush

This mostly applies to sellers: if your real estate agent does not consider your sale a priority, your home may remain on the market for a while and lose its competitive edge. In most cases, you want to demand high and fast results, even if you are willing to wait for the right offer.

This is your dream home

As a potential buyer, you may think that admiring someone’s home is likable and will likely increase your chances of your offer being accepted. In some cases it may. However, it can also let the seller know that you will do anything to win, including paying more than the list price or seeing no flaws, and will take away your negotiating leverage. Play cool.

Do you hate decor?

On the other hand, offending the seller’s taste probably won’t get you a house. Remember that furniture, artwork, paint colors, cabinets, lighting fixtures – everything really is temporary and can be changed to suit your preferences when you become an owner. You don’t want to appear rude or difficult to work with.

Do you think the listed price is too high?

Basically, keep any judgments about the property you are viewing to yourself. You may think so, but by saying this to the seller or their agent, you are more likely to put them on the defensive.

You have a certain dollar amount to spend

If you tell the seller or their listing agent that you have a certain budget, they will likely expect you to spend every last cent. Similarly, if you report that you only have X dollars, which is less than other potential buyers can offer, they may immediately lower your offer.

Do not reveal anything about your finances to anyone who is not working for you.

You need a specific type of buyer

As a seller, you can hand over your home to a buyer with whom you are connected and who you believe will take care of the property. However, having a specific type of person or family in mind is a slippery slope to discrimination. Many real estate professionals now discourage more personal communications such as “love letters” from buyers that may violate the Fair Housing Act.

Any direct personal questions

While it may seem harmless to ask the salesperson why they are moving, or to ask neighbors very sensitive questions about the area and their experience of living in it, it can also lead to defensiveness, gossip, or trespassing.

Any hard rules

Finally, you probably want to keep all absolutes to yourself. For example, if you tell your listing agent that you won’t accept offers below a certain dollar amount, or that you only want “serious” offers, you may be missing out on great opportunities that can be negotiated in your favor. It’s good to keep your own expectations in mind, but staying flexible will likely leave you with more and better options.

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