What’s the Best Way to Tell Kids the Truth About Santa?
I may not remember much about my childhood, but I remember this: third grade. Mrs. Cannon’s class. She reads Judy Bloom’s Superfudge . She stops halfway and says, “Okay. Everyone who believes in Santa goes out into the hall. “
Although I may not have had a vocabulary at the time, I definitely thought, “Um, what the fuck ? Did this lady just say that Santa is not real, and if any of you fools still think he is, get out so I don’t have to carry this weight on my shoulders? ” She did. No doubt she did it.
Naturally, I went out into the hall, like the one who does not have the skills of self-preservation. I would like to think that this was due to my unwavering commitment to truth and an innate disregard for peer pressure just to maintain appearance. In fact, I was either too overwhelmed to do anything other than follow my naive footsteps, or I knew that something serious was about to ruin my world and wanted to control how and when that would happen. ( Out of your turn Mrs. Cannon !)
So, I spent a few awkward minutes without eye contact in the hallway with one – one ! – another brave young soul, not afraid to swear allegiance to a cheerful fat man in a red suit who can somehow squeeze through millions of chimneys around the world in one night. And then I persuaded my mother to tell me the truth on the way home.
To be honest, I can’t remember how she explained it or how I took it. (My guess: not very good.) There are different points of view on Santa. Some parents never instill a myth in their children, either because of its roots in paganism or because they do not want to participate in widespread social lies. Others will assure even their fifth-graders who interviewed that Saint Nick is real, responding to all the seeds of doubt sown by the kids on the bus with the words, “Well, what do they know?”
No matter where you fall on Santa’s spectrum, if your kids have ever been to the mall in December, there will probably come a time when they turn to you and ask, “Is this guy real?” And you will be seized by raging panic, look into their innocent eyes and say this classic parental escape question – “Well, what do you think?” – before breaking down and admitting that ruddy, smelling Marlborough and Irish coffee dude in whose lap you forced them to sit down for photos was suspicious and you ripped off their delicate, forming psyches for years. But for a good reason!
Or maybe not. Maybe you are more optimistic and prepared. Perhaps your parents explained this to you in a magical, relevant, and non-traumatic way. Perhaps you were too young or too old for this to leave a big mark.
The question arises at this time of year: how and when is the best time to tell your children the truth about Santa? Tell us your tips, tricks, touching stories or epic failures and we’ll cover them in a future post – and hopefully help other parents better deal with their dilemma this Christmas season. (Or at least rest assured someone else made it worse.)