How to Tell Arrogance From Confidence
Arrogance is disgusting; but confidence is adored and sought after. However, given that the two characteristics are somewhat similar in nature, how can you tell them apart? And at what point do you go from believing in yourself to self-deception, to straightforward narcissism? The line isn’t always clear, but when you keep the two personality types to a minimum, their differences begin to show.
How is confidence different from arrogance?
We live in a culture that values ​​confidence , which is often considered the foundation of success . Confidence, as Eric Ravenscourt wrote for Lifehacker in 2013 , is “knowing what you are good at, what value you are, and acting in a way that communicates that to others.”
Confident people can balance between overconfidence and cockiness, but they will always tame bravado just enough so as not to emit an arrogant atmosphere. First, a confident person may want to compliment their own skills, but they will still take the time to listen to other people and get feedback or constructive criticism.
Moreover, confident people tend to emphasize the success of others because they are not afraid that other people deserve a round of applause. As the consultancy Emerald Works explained in 2019 , confident people are generous, but arrogant people are not. In the workplace, you might understand two opposing examples like this:
For example, in meetings, arrogant people tend to seek attention. Consciously or unconsciously, they make others feel less important. They may speak condescendingly, talk to people, or display body language that shows a lack of interest in others.
Conversely, confident people can shed light on the accomplishments of their colleagues in meetings or in group work. They seek advice, encourage teamwork, and generously praise their colleagues.
One way to look at this is the relationship between those who are confident and arrogant towards other people. Those who are confident understand their abilities and talents, but they strive to use these qualities to improve those around them. They can do this by teaching and setting an example, or perhaps through rhetorical support and encouragement.
On the contrary, arrogant people really only seek to promote themselves. They show a clear lack of humility when their skills or credibility are challenged, and they really don’t have time to seriously consider any criticism they meet.
These two qualities may seem similar when viewed in the context of what someone is just saying about themselves, but it is their relationship with others that reveals their true colors.
How to let your confidence show
If you choose confidence over arrogance (a boon to you in the first place), there are ways to make it more obvious to those around you. In addition to the inner self-confidence that you may have cultivated over the years honing your skills (or perhaps pure talent of yours), you can exude confidence while welcoming the prospect of learning even more .
Accept criticism – be it at work, from friends, your romantic partner, or whoever – and use it as a motivation tool. You can be confident in your self-confidence, but recognizing that there is always something to learn will set you apart from those who ooze arrogance. You should also feel comfortable setting an example and helping others learn. Your knowledge and skills can be used for the benefit of everyone who wants to learn, and knowing this will help you look healthy and confident, not arrogant.