How to Prepare for a Promiscuous Summer After Vaccinations

Adults are, of course, allowed to beat other willing adults, and from this week they are also allowed to be vaccinated against COVID-19. And after more than a year of compulsory and necessary isolation, everyone becomes lustful. Hell, everyone was lustful, but the vaccinations finally revealed a light at the end of the tunnel. And for many, this light is a dissolute summer.

While it is still important to stay safe, the slutty summer is approaching, and from what our sources say, there is no stopping there. Danielle Noguera, CEO of 5 Star Smiles , a Miami-based cosmetic dentistry company, said it was “obvious” that people are gearing up for the 2021 season that will offset 2020.

“Now that [the city] is reopening, everyone wants to feel better. They want to look their best, ”she told Lifehacker, noting that she’s seen the lines outside of cosmetic surgery rooms in Coral Gables for weeks now, and that everyone she knows is already out and about. “They just want to get ready for the summer, you know? It’s exciting because everyone has had a time-out for a year and a half. “

Planning to join the party and want to stay safe? Here are some helpful tips.

Remember the pandemic is not over yet

You could have followed all the rules from March 2020 – put on a mask, stay at home, refuse to meet with your family on holidays and get vaccinated – but not everything was done or done. There are many people who have been eligible for an injection for several months but refuse to receive it. You must account for them and for people who did not have the resources to vaccinate or the ability to work from home. People are still dying from this virus.

So, first things first: you will still have to wear a mask, at least to indoor meetings, if you are not sure if everyone in attendance is vaccinated. (The CDC says that if everyone is vaccinated and not living with a person at risk, you may not be wearing a mask , but are you really going to ask this question to everyone at the party?) Continue washing your hands. Make a laminated vaccine card or store it in a holder and see if your state has a vaccine proof storage app on your phone. Even if you feel completely out of place, don’t forget about COVID-19.

Think of all the ways you can deal with communicable diseases and infections in your social life before the pandemic. You will never share lip balm with someone who has visible herpes. You would never sleep with someone who refused to use protection or dodged when you asked when they were last tested. COVID symptoms are new herpes in this analogy, and masks are new condoms. Test results are new … test results. Just incorporate your COVID precautions into your existing pre-dating checklist.

Meet a new conversation in front of the pillow

In the coming months, you may open it up a lot, but the fact remains: the process will not be the same as it was in the past summer months. Namely, the days when you had to bring a stranger home and acquire carnal knowledge without first knowing their name are gone.

The allure of an anonymous connection can be strong if you’ve spent months in isolation with a roommate or family members you know too much about – but hold off, at least for a while. You still need to know a thing or two about the person you are trying to beat. Ask them when they last tested for COVID, what precautions they usually take, if they have a high-risk job, and if they are vaccinated.

Colleen, a 28-year-old Brooklyn resident who calls herself a “local whore,” told Lifehacker that she would spend the next few months “as naked as possible” and “totally slutty” to catch up with summer 2020. However, she said, she plans to ask every potential partner about their vaccine status, no exceptions.

Drex Clemons, comedian , “unflappable freak” and newly vaccinated 27-year-old Brooklyn resident, recently re-uploaded his old set of dating apps and is ready to dive into them, but he also started conversations with matches with his Johnson & Johnson vaccine to “watch whether they themselves will open up about vaccination. ” Clemons made it clear that he wants to communicate only with other vaccinated people, but noted that the conversation was not difficult at all.

“Vaccinations are news.” I have a dog, “he explained. That is, most potential partners have already recorded this in their Tinder bios.

Get ready with a personalized routine

Clemons and Colleen said they added a few steps to their regular personal care routine to help them feel their best and faster.

Colleen has always been a runner, she said, but she began to introduce HIIT workouts, yoga and Peloton rides into her fitness routine. She’s also always been into skincare, but she just splurged on top-notch Drunk Elephant products and added new steps to her regimen, along with teeth whitening strips and a new electric toothbrush. The recent move was influenced in part by her desire for rooftop access, and after signing a new lease, she has ordered new bikinis and plans to start ” fully waxing”.

Clemons’ changes were similar. He told Lifehacker, “I started going to the gym, gotten better food, bought new spring clothes, moved into a better apartment and updated the furniture.”

He also prepared himself mentally . Clemons noted that he had a lot of personal growth in quarantine and no longer feels like the only thing he has to offer a potential mate is sex. According to him, from his experience with applications, he believes that other loners are in the same mood.

“We’ve all spent a year trying to figure out what we want,” he said, noting that while he met aggressively pro-lecherous summer users with a Tinder bio instructing digital fans to “swipe if [they] voted for Biden, and enjoy eating ass. “” He also found many people who say bluntly that they are looking for meaningful relationships after so many months of being alone.

Believe me, if you were not among those who did a lot of quarantine introspection and self-improvement, you are not alone either. If you want, you still have time to think.

Noguera added that she has seen many people enjoy cosmetic enhancements after taking a year off from beauty care.

“A lot of people gain uncomfortable weight,” she said. “They don’t take care of themselves. They haven’t done hair or anything else that makes them feel sexy or attractive. So right now it feels like an overflow of everyone wanting to feel good, look good, spend money and be on the street. “

Accept the skin you are in or make a complete repair. Nobody needs to know that you’ve just spent 15 months in a shabby sports workout unless you want to.

Back to practice

Have you noticed now you are a little uncomfortable in conversation when you meet someone new? This Lifehacker writer recently messed up Dairy Queen’s personal order so much that she wanted to leave without her Brownie Batter Blizzard. Before the pandemic, talking to people – from hot guys to ice cream waiters – wasn’t really a problem.

The moral of the story is that you need to stick to it, whether you’re waiting for a frozen treat after forgetting how to communicate, or trying to talk to a prospective lover. In any case, there is a reward at the end.

Clemons said that even though he’s logged into dating apps again, he still plans to meet and talk to people in real life as much as possible.

“I’m going to be in street bars, parks, bars and rooftops,” he said. “I prefer to meet people in person.”

We will not lie to you: you can strike here. But you could also fail trying to hit someone else in 2019 when you had a lot of practice too. Don’t get hung up on how unaccustomed you are to talking to people; focus on how easy it was before , and remember that you can come back to that moment even if you weren’t always successful then.

And here’s the good news: Colleen said she thinks she’ll end up lowering her old standards a little “in the name of entertainment.” Even if you’re a little socially out of place right now, so are everyone else, so your chances of success are pretty high. Go outside – really somewhere, with outdoor bars in mind whenever possible – and have fun. Safely.