How to Tell Someone That You Are Still Uncomfortable Going to Their Big Event During COVID

While it is truly difficult to look at the global pandemic that is causing more than 566,000 deaths in the United States alone, and to pinpoint anything positive that it caused , there were several aspects of public health measures that some people found convenient. …

Whether it’s the ability to work remotely or a legitimate excuse to stop communicating, there have probably been times when the demands of social distancing and limited gathering made things a little easier for you. In fact, they could rid you of something you didn’t want to walk on at all.

Aside from your desire (or lack thereof) to socialize, you may still (rightly) worry about attending in-person events and wonder how to deal with invitations that have begun to trickle down. Some people in your life will probably fully understand.

Others, however, will resist and explain to you why they think their event is really safe – usually some version of “but it will be outdoors and everyone will wear masks and be very careful.” Okay, but no. Here are some ways to help you navigate the thread in which you decline their invitation.

Yes, we are 100% still in a pandemic

In 2020, people (for the most part) have embraced reluctance to spread or contract a deadly virus as the reason you don’t attend their wedding, graduation, birthday, Thanksgiving dinner, etc. But now that it’s been a few months B During the deployment of the COVID-19 vaccine, people seem to think that everything is done and cleaned up and we are clean.

We are not going to go into all the reasons why this is not the case ( even 25% of the country has not yet been vaccinated!), But if someone gives you an old one, but COVID is basically over and most people visit at least got the first dose vaccines, don’t let them make you feel guilty for accepting the invitation. You don’t “go overboard” or “make too much of it” or resist the fact that “people should live their own lives” and that “the world should someday return to normal.” Just wanted to get it out of the way first.

You can avoid conflict

Telling a cousin that you cannot attend her wedding is difficult on many levels, and for some people it includes worrying about conflict situations. In an article for Well + Good, Mary Grace Garis spoke with psychologist Dr.Aimee Daramus , who explained that your ability to deal with stress, including that arises from potential conflicts, is probably quite low right now.

And aside from not wanting to harm your relationship with your cousin, you may not be in a place where you can handle any other risk, such as transmitting or contracting a deadly virus. But then again, don’t let this make the decision for you. “While this is difficult, try not to let politics or the choice of friends influence your health decisions – unless your friends are experts on viruses or risk management – because the virus is not a popularity competition,” Daramus told Well + Good …

What to say when declining event invitations

According to Diana Gottsman , national etiquette expert and author of modern etiquette for a better life who Garis is also interviewed for her article, has a tough conversation (or send a note declining an invitation) as soon as possible. And be sure to make it short, sweet and polite.

Can’t find the words? Gottsman provides this sample script which (with some minor language tweaks if needed) can help:

“I would like to contact you personally and thank you for the invitation. Unfortunately, I am still uncomfortable traveling or being in any crowd at the moment. I appreciate your understanding and want you to know that we wish you the best of luck and celebrate as soon as the pandemic is over. ”

Ideally, the person will understand, although they may be disappointed. But then again: we are still in a pandemic, so the social norms and expectations that existed before 2020 are a thing of the past (you probably left it open for fresh air and ventilation).

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