It’s Time to Write Down Grandma’s Family Stories
If you’re fortunate enough to have an older person in your life – be it a parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, or even a family friend – know that you have access to a living piece of the story. As a child, you may not have been interested in hearing their stories from the past, but as an adult, it’s much easier for you to understand the value of learning from their experiences. You may have even talked about sitting down and writing down how they tell their stories or answer questions about what their childhood life was like. Well, for the foreseeable future, we are all stuck at home, so now is the time.
Set up a time to call
Usually, the biggest obstacle to these conversations with family members is finding time. This is why you should take advantage of the fact that everyone is at home now. Sure, you are busy (and they may be too), but at least it will be easier for you to schedule a time to talk. This is the first step: call the person and set up a time to talk.
You may be better off using the term “interview” rather than “interview” because some people may feel pressured during the “interview” or even disagree with it. But regardless of the terminology, be sure to let the person know that you will be recording your conversation, and the purpose of this is to preserve and possibly decipher their part of the family history for future generations. Make sure you both set aside enough time to talk so that you are not rushed, but you don’t have to tell the person that they have two or three hours to talk, because that’s likely to sound intimidating.
Questions are ready
Asking a broad question like “Could you tell me about your life?” not always the best approach as you will probably get a relatively concise answer. Instead, prepare a set of specific questions to help get things going. Storycorps has a great list of questions .
In addition, if this person is the unofficial family history keeper, you will also want to ask them about their family history and knowledge. Thus, these stories will not disappear when this person is no longer around. In both cases (by asking about their own life and other family history), the person may start by saying that they don’t remember much, but usually when they start talking, one memory suggests another, and so on.
Photos can also be a great clue.
Most families have a drawer or shoebox (or even album) full of old unmarked family photos where you think the guy in the hat is your Uncle Jerry, but you’re not 100 percent sure and will need to check. It’s time to check. If you are talking to this person via video link, prepare some photos for which you have questions. Show them the photo and ask who these people are, where and when it was taken, and what else they can tell you. If they have photos, ask them to bring them to the hangout for discussion. Even if it’s an old family portrait that has been hanging on the wall since the mid-1970s and you’ve walked by it a million times, there may be certain stories behind the painting that you’ve never heard before.
Get ready to write
If you are not currently in quarantine with the person you want to interview, the conversation will take place over the phone or via video call. Now that everyone is using Zoom, this is a great option for this kind of discussion as you can record both video and audio . Skype has a similar recording function . You can also record video via Google Meet or audio via Google Voice . You can also put your phone on the speaker and use a good old voice recorder (or someone else’s phone) to record the sound during a call. Or try Otter , which lets you record through their website (again, you’ll need to perform) and provides a free AI challenge transcription. (Far from ideal, but a good start if you’re interested in decrypting.)
Be an active listener
This may sound obvious, but it is important to listen during these conversations. Put on your reporter’s hat (of course, it could be fedora – it’s imaginary) and ask follow-up questions. You can take notes during the conversation so you know which topics you want to return to and return to.
Also notice if / when the person starts to get tired. Some people are more than happy to talk about themselves for hours, but for others, it’s a completely new experience that can be exhausting – especially reliving old memories that they may not have thought of in years. If you notice that the person is slowing down, ask him if he would like to stop for the day and continue the conversation at another time. If so, immediately schedule your next call to be on schedule. Take a note where you left off in the conversation. You can also ask the person to write down any interesting stories or tidbits they think about after the conversation ends that they might want to discuss next time. Finally, don’t forget to thank them for their time – they really do give you a gift.