Try a New Accessory Away From Friends
Good friends inspire, inspire, and propel you for the better, but best friends know your weaknesses and can focus on your insecurities with laser precision. This isn’t always a bad thing – as it’s important to remain humble – but if you’re trying out a new “look,” like a fun hat or a brightly colored lip, it’s best to take it for a walk away from friends (who might have an opinion).
Even if your friends are not assholes, they will feel obligated to comment on any aspect of your appearance that you have changed, and it is best to try a bold new look away from their gaze so that you don’t internalize their reactions in front of you. feel the piece. (Men will argue that they don’t, but when I was working as an engineer – and it was a very tough environment for guys – I couldn’t wear pale pink lipstick unless I was told, “Oooh, looks like someone dressed today. !” direction.)
This is a particularly useful strategy if you are outside your comfort zone. I am not a hat lover, for example, and suddenly putting on a hat will generate comments from my friends no matter what I do, so I must fully form my opinion before entering. You know what they (athletic people?) Say, the best defense is a good offense, and the only good offense here is confidence.
Having dyed my hair blue for the first time, I immediately went to a bar where, as I knew, there would be no friends or acquaintances. I drank my martini and got used to the blue-haired woman feeling comfortable. Not only did no one comment on this, but the man offered me a drink (I declined). After drinking the drink I bought myself, I went to my regular bar, fully stocked by my friends, and was greeted with the question, “What have you done with your hair?” “I painted it blue,” I said, tempered by my previous interactions (and lack of reaction).
But even without positive reinforcement from someone biting you, trying to look in itself allows you to understand how that accessory or cosmetics makes them feel . So I found out that I do not take. I tried to accidentally put on a beret three times in the world three times, and each time it seems to me that I am wearing a suit, although no one reacts badly to it. Every time I put a bright red wool hat over my head, I get distracted by the fact that it is there and turn my eyes to my very round head. It’s not perfect. (Sometimes I wear takes on vacation because it’s fun not to feel like myself on vacation.)
Berets aside, this move allowed me to explore a few bold things, such as oddly shaped sunglasses, Cheeto branded bodysuits, very dark lipstick, extremely winged lining, and a wide variety of plunging necklines, all of which I wear with confidence. (In fact, I rarely check cutouts anymore; I really like the reaction they cause.)