How to Convince Someone to Follow Through Without Nagging
If you hate sending these annoying “just check it out!” emails where you check to see if the person who promised to do something for you will actually do it, then here’s a slightly cooler way to test it without making anyone feel bad.
The Gareth’s Tips, Tools and Shop Tales newsletter recommends a strategically deferred thank you email:
This one is a little crafty. When you ask someone to do you a favor on the Internet, and they say they will, do not immediately respond with “Thank you.” Wait to see if they do what they asked. If they don’t do it (in the desired time frame), please send your “Thank you”. This will be a reminder to them. This way, you don’t run the risk of annoying them by sending additional annoying emails.
It’s tricky, but not creepy. It’s okay for people to forget to do what they said they’d do, and reminding them is helpful. But finding fault with them is annoying. In this way, you turn the nag into a happier reminder by sincerely thanking them for what they are about to do. If nagging over email can make someone resent saying yes, a grateful letter makes them feel better. (If a polite, non-intrusive letter makes them regret that they never said yes, then they shouldn’t have said yes.)
This method is not reliable. If you phrase it incorrectly, your “thank you” will be perceived as passive-aggressive or even sarcastic. Your email requires careful timing and phrasing. Follow these rules:
- Send a Thank You Email within a few days or weeks: It’s normal time to “forget” to reply to an email, see it in your inbox, and reply. (Use Gmail or Boomerang’s repeat feature.)
- We express our sincere gratitude. If you are having trouble with this right now, find an old letter in which you thanked someone for a similar service or task and copy it.
- State a reason why what they do for you is so beneficial. Explain why a deadline is so important. “I forgot to say: thank you very much for the notes on my resume! When I apply to Zombocom on Thursday, I will feel much more confident. “
- Don’t use the phrase “Thanks in advance”. To some, this seems rude and arrogant.
- When appropriate, mention that a scaled-down version of the service would be good too. (Better to include the smaller option in the original service request.) Sometimes having this option helps the other person handle the “large” version of the service.
- If it’s about a service and not a task that the person actually owes you (like a report from a coworker), send just one thank you email. The curse of many subsequent letters, however worded. If you want to remind them, you have to do it offline.
Thank you very much for your positive feedback! And it’s so nice of you to share this on LinkedIn! Let’s have a little drink!