I Am Caroline Ingeborn, President and COO of Toca Boca, and I Am a Parent.
Caroline Ingeborn is President and Chief Operating Officer of Toca Boca , which makes digital toys designed the way kids play. (My 5-year-old loves to get a haircut atToca , bandage pigeons at Toca Pet Doctor, and make weird milkshakes at Toca Kitchen .) Ingeborn, who moved to the US from Sweden to help open the company’s San Francisco office, believes the play space is has a huge responsibility to create more inclusive products. She talks to us about how to balance her career and become a mom to a toddler who is about to have a new baby. That’s how her parents are.
Name : Caroline Ingeborn Residence : San Francisco Job : President and COO Toca Boca Family : Husband Gustav, daughter Teddy (2 and 9 months old), and 6 weeks left before our baby is born!
Tell us a little about your family and your career. Was life mostly according to plan or were there any surprises?
I met my husband a long time ago and we were both very focused on enjoying life, including pursuing successful careers. So there has never been a really “good time” to have children.
We’ve been together for over 10 years and I was getting older, so I told him, “I know this is not the right time, but kids are not something you can control, and if that’s what we know that we want in our life, then we should just go for it. There will never be a convenient time. “
So we decided to have kids, which I thought would take some time, but luckily it happened very quickly. When I was pregnant, we sold Toka Boka. I remember changing my mind and crying to both my husband and our co-founder, saying, “This is the worst time in the world,” and they said, “No, when it comes to children, there is no such thing as a good or a bad time. … “Of course they were right. My maternity leave was very hard with the sale of Toca Boca and the rush to meetings, but I had no other choice. Parenting is the single most important thing.
Tell us about your morning routine. What are your best tricks to get out the door?
Toca Boca has a big studio in Sweden, so I often get calls early in the morning. On the days when they call me (this is about half of the work week), Gustav is 100% taking care of Teddy in the morning. The second half of the time I take it while Gustav is boxing. So we split it 50/50 until our beloved nanny arrives.
However, this will change dramatically when Teddy goes to kindergarten. To be honest, I’m not at all ready for how we are going to do this.
How much outside help do you get as a parent? Who or what cannot you live without?
They help us a lot. I cannot live without our nanny Tanya. She’s like the real Mary Poppins. Not only does she create the most magical everyday life for Teddy, she also helped Gustav and me become much better parents. There is no one like her.
What gadgets, apps, charts, or tools do you rely on?
I rely on Slack and WhatsApp for my work . I would not have been able to work without them, especially since we are constantly faced with the time difference between our offices in San Francisco and Stockholm. For family, I rely on Sago Mini World, some of our old Toca Boca apps for toddlers, and YouTube.
Has parenting changed the way you work?
Being a parent changed the way I work. I used to like to linger in the office. Then it is quiet, without meetings and you have time to do so much.
To be honest, I did a lot of things that I no longer do. I had to prioritize much better: think about what only I can do and no one else.
I also try to constantly stick to the tasks and projects that I enjoy. I find it extremely important that I have a passion for work in order to stay in it and enjoy it. I’m lucky to be working in a place like this!
What’s your evening routine?
When I’m not traveling, I usually go to Teddy’s house at 5:00 pm. By the time I get home, she is already eaten or about to eat, and then we play for a while. She directs what we play with. Now we have jam sessions at home, where she decides who plays which instrument and when you are allowed to play and when not. Now I play the smallest drum and do very few slow drum beats.
Then we take a bath. Sometimes I take a bath with her. After that, she runs naked for a while, usually around the time her father comes home. Then we dress her in pajamas, brush her teeth, and if we don’t have friends, we have a pretty long history. She decides what we are reading and who is reading it, and then, after a long story, the lights are turned off and she goes to bed. I usually go back to work while Gustav prepares dinner for the two of us.
How do you unpack?
When I am in a good place, I train or initiate new projects. I read, see my friends and travel. When I’m not in a good place, I exercise less and watch more TV. I try to keep track of whether I am in a good place or not by observing my actions. By doing this, it is easy to see where I am from what I am doing physically. If I find that I need an adjustment, I try to figure out why and adapt.
What are you most proud of as a parent?
My daughter is very funny – she has a good sense of humor and I love it. So I get high every time she does something stupid or naughty. Right now, she thinks that joking is very funny, and I really like it.
What do you want your children to learn from your example?
I think there is something to say to grow and believe, a bit like Forrest Gump, that life is a box of chocolates and you never know what you’ll get. It’s important to keep an open mind about where life can take you. To see opportunities, not obstacles, whether you are a boy or a girl, or where you are from. I borrowed this from my parents, who were and remain an excellent example for me. I think that if a child grows up with faith and a sense of it, it will set him up for an exciting life.
What are your favorite funny / weird / special family rituals?
In Sweden, at the height of summer, they dance around the May pole. There are many songs, and you hold hands and dance in the ring. My grandmother sang one of these songs with me and my brother when we were little, at home in the kitchen. My husband and I started doing this with our daughter, and she likes it.
Lately, she has begun to leave us hanging in the middle of it all. The three of us will be singing – maybe at the airport or in the middle of the sidewalk – and she will suddenly stop, so my husband and I will sing and dance with enthusiasm on our own.
Has anyone ever given you parenting advice that you really liked?
The entire Toca Boca team spent a week in Lisbon last week and we focused on the game. There are so many reasons why children need to play freely. One of our speakers talked about how play increases resilience in both children and adults, and how play helps us cope with new situations. I’ve added resilience to my long list of why play is a force for good in the world and how important it is for kids to keep playing as they get older.
What’s the hardest part about being a parent?
Time is the hardest part. Certainly. I always want to spend more time with my family, friends, my health and work. And somehow only 24 hours. It boils down to focusing on whatever you have time for, not the other way around.
What’s your favorite part of the day?
I have two favorites: when Teddy wakes up, and when I come from the office and she opens the door. When we see each other and reunite, these are the best sides.
As a technology parent, what are the rules for using screen time in your home?
In fact, we have no set rules. We are a very active family, and our daughter is still very young, so we didn’t talk to her much. I think there are places and times when kids enjoy playing with screens, and there are places and times when it’s less useful. There is a time and a place for everything.