I Am Mallika Chopra, a Writer and Entrepreneur, and I Am a Parent.
As a child, Mallika Chopra’s father, Deepak Chopra, asked her to study four questions: Who am I? What do I want? How can I serve? What am I grateful for? Now, as an entrepreneur, speaker, and author of Just Breathe , a new guide to meditation for children , Mallika uses these questions to help others discover their intentions and improve their lives. She has taught meditation to thousands of people around the world, including her two daughters, Tara and Leela. That’s how her parents are.
Name: Mallika Chopra Location: Santa Monica, California Work: Mom, Author, Speaker Family: Husband Sumant Mandal and daughters Tara (16) and Leela (14). Our dog is Yoda.
Tell us a little about your family and your career. Was life mostly according to plan or were there any surprises?
Life was a confusing journey for me. I’ve found that there are times when life seems to flow smoothly – relationships, health, inspiring work – and then something happens that makes me stop and ask, “Am I really happy? Am I doing what am I supposed to be doing? »I believe in constantly asking questions.
Tell us about your morning routine.
Morning is all it takes to get my kids on the bus by 6:57 am! The alarm goes off at 6:07 am, walk the dog, drink tea, get ready. My husband prepares breakfast for the girls. We have to get out of the house by 6:40, but it’s usually 6:45 and we hurry to the bus. Agree, this is not the most peaceful time of our days. After picking up the children, I come home, make coffee, sit in bed and meditate for 20 minutes. I hope my kids meditate on the bus when they go to school, but I’m sure they are actually just asleep!
How much outside help do you get as a parent? Who or what cannot you live without?
I am fortunate to have a family that is fully involved in raising my girls. My mom has been working with me since the day my first daughter was born. In fact, I got my MBA from Northwestern University’s Kellogg School of Management when I had a daughter, and my mother, mother-in-law, and aunt from India took turns watching my daughter as I ran back and forth to class.
What gadgets, apps, charts, or tools do you rely on?
Only my iPhone. Everything I need is there: phone, text, email, news, social media. And I like to measure how many steps I take each day.
Has the way you work changed the way you become a parent?
So I found my voice. When I knew that I was going to become a mom, I felt the need to study where I came from and what lessons I want to pass on to my children, and this is how I began to write and speak in public.
Do you involve your children in work?
Yes, my children are fully involved in my work and are very proud of it. When I decided to write Just Breathe , I actually sat down with them to understand what creates stress and anxiety for them and their friends, from taking a test to social media to feeling confused.
How do you like your evening routine?
Unlike in the morning, our evenings are relaxed. My kids are usually at home after school. They do their homework, and we try to have lunch together every night. I love that my family talks about today, and in general we are all obsessed with the news, so current events take up a lot of conversations at dinner.
I’m a sleep freak, so I require everyone to go to bed by 9 pm, with rare exceptions at night when they need to start their lessons later.
What’s your favorite technique for staying in the moment when things start to feel overwhelming?
Whenever I feel depressed, angry, or frustrated, I STOP. S-stop. T-Take three breaths. O-Watch the body. P-Continue. This practice helps you move from a fight-or-flight regime to a more thoughtful response to any situation.
It’s so easy for kids to press our buttons – because they know exactly which ones to press – and sometimes we react in ways that we later regret. The STOP exercise helped me pause and respond more consciously and appropriately. It saved me from unintentional statements or actions that I might later regret.
Tell us about the family ritual.
It’s inappropriate, but we love watching shows like Scandal and Empire together! I solve the puzzle while the rest of the family and Yoda are resting on the couch.
What are you most proud of as a parent?
Knowing that my daughters are kind and respectful. Often strangers come up to me and say that my daughters are polite and charming, and I shine with joy.
What moment are you least proud of?
I read my daughter’s diary and undermine her confidence.
What do you want your children to learn from your example?
The importance of gratitude is not only for material things, but also for relationships, opportunities, and the planet.
What’s the hardest part about being a parent?
Trust. Recently, my daughter started driving. It took the confidence that she could take care of herself on a whole different level!
What’s your favorite part of the day?
Pick up my girls from the bus and hear about their days. Even on days when they share little with each other, just sitting in the car while decompression is a good time together. It is a daily ritual that makes it predictable and so special to me. Now that my oldest daughter is driving and driving her sister to school, I will desperately be looking for something new to replace this special time.
The only thing I would like to say to other parents who are pursuing a career:
Don’t try to do everything – make the right choices and be ready to let go of some things. As a parent, I’ve found that I just need to think differently about time. Flexibility gives you a lot of freedom.