Sign the Lease If You Return to Your Parents
Life happens. In one minute you are nearing release, ready to conquer the world. The next time you lose your job or cannot find one in your area, you can no longer afford the rent. If you’re lucky, your parents are willing and able to let you go back and regroup before you return to the world to live on your own.
You are grateful – you do not want to use your parents. When this happens, make the transition smoother by writing down on paper what the conditions for your stay at home will be like when you rent. Write down how long you intend to stay there, whether you will pay, and what your responsibilities will be until you get home.
“Make things as formal as possible. Don’t just rely on a handshake, says Anthony D. Criscuolo, a certified financial planner based in Florida . “Each party may have expectations of how the deal will work, but those expectations can be very different if not discussed openly, so communication and writing the terms is important.”
Also important: make sure you talk frankly with your parents before moving in about what their financial situation looks like and how stressful you will be to them. You want it to be as easy and painless as possible.
“Don’t be afraid to ask tough but nurturing questions about how helping you can fit into their monthly budget or long-term plans,” says Criscuolo. “And do not skimp on details of your own situation that might cause your parents or another family member to unnecessarily assume the worst.”
If necessary, when you agree to the terms, invite a neutral third party. The honesty you are capable of will make the transition smoother and hopefully help prevent future resentment. So be honest about your situation, both career-wise and financially.
“It’s more difficult for parents to take you back into their home if they don’t have a clue about your situation, other than the fact that you say you have a need,” says Jeff White, financial analyst at FitSmallBusiness .com. “Then there can be frustrations every time they see that you are spending money on ‘additional services’ and not on needs. They may think that you are just taking advantage of their kindness. “
Provide parents with an eviction plan
Here are some more tips from Jeff Proctor, owner of DollarSprout.com :
- Make it clear that this is a temporary solution.
- Make a clear plan for how to get back on your feet. For example, explain to your parents how you will improve your earning situation, how you will change your budget, how long you plan to stay, etc.
- Set a firm date for achieving your goal: a) go back, or b) reconsider how to do it.
Laura Boeges, Welfare Advisor at HighTower St. Louis generally agrees, adding that it is important to take the time to regroup and also work to get your finances in order while you have some kind of safety net.
Make the most of your time at home, prioritizing paying off debt , building up your loan, and more. If your parents don’t want the rent, take the initiative and set that money aside in a segregated account.
“Agree with your parents about what you will do to help the household while you’re there,” says Bodges. “Offer to pay rent or pay monthly utilities.”
Most importantly, “treat your people with respect,” says Bodges. “Follow your agreements. They gave you a break. “