The Secret to Getting People to Really Show Your Party

You talked about your plans with your friends face to face, you created an event page on Facebook and invited them, but people still seem to resent you. What gives? Well, you’re still not making it easy for them.

I have a friend who is great at organizing friendly meetings that people always come to. Like, really good . Whether it’s a party, a hike, dinner, vacation, or just a day at the beach when he’s collecting something, everyone will be on board. These are two important tips that I have learned from him over the years.

Re-plan everything

People are lazy and busy. If your event requires them to do some work – even as simple as making a decision – their interest will fade. So, you need to do almost everything for them before even inviting them. This means choosing a place, time and type of activity, and providing them with all the information they need from the very beginning.

Don’t give people options or ask them questions about their preferences, just offer them an activity to which they can only say yes or no. Then you want to provide them with so much information about the specified activity that the only thing they have to do is come and have a good time. The less they have to try, the more likely they are to do it.

Never Stop Hosting

Okay, you have people who should show up this time, but you need to show them a fun and easy time so that they want to show up next time too. You can do this by continuing to accept, help, and provide information after people have arrived. Be the one to lead, do shit, and encourage people to have a good time. Once you give up trying, so will they.


I can best explain this with an example. When my friend plans a beach day, he does the following:

  1. Day and time decide. The situation only changes if most of the people invited suggest a different day and time that seems more convenient for all participants.
  2. Chooses a beach, then notes why he chose this beach over others. He shares these tapes later, so the conversation never turns to “What about this other beach …”
  3. Creates a Facebook event, then adds directions, helpful links, and lists your phone number with a message like “Feel free to call me if you need anything.”
  4. Sends out invitations, often in the form of text messages and Facebook invitations. He knows that not everyone checks their Facebook every day, and knows that some people just close their event tabs. He lets people know that they are more than just a tick when he invites them.
  5. Sends a reminder a couple of days before and offers help if someone needs it. He has lent me a boogie-woogie board on several occasions, has offered to pick up food for me, has given other people rides, and usually gives parking advice ahead of time. It makes it difficult to refuse!
  6. On the day of the meeting, he must be the first one to tune in there. Then he sends the card with the pin to exactly where he is.
  7. When everyone is present, he does his best to make sure everyone else has a good time. Even if it means that you have to do something less exciting for a while in order to help.

Sure, it’s a lot of work, but he always manages to bring people together and he still has a good time when he does. So, the next time you want to get people together, reschedule and overfulfill the plan. Make it easy for your friends to show them off, then take it a step further. After all, people won’t be able to refuse your invitations.


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