How to Deal With Mother’s Day When Mother’s Day Sucks for You

Earlier this week, those of you struggling to get through Mother’s Day shared your strategies for making your day less painful. That’s what you told us.

Avoid social media

For everyone suffering on Mother’s Day, Facebook and Instagram are a minefield: photo after photo of smiling faces at Mother’s Day brunch and posts dedicated to moms who have a good relationship with their children. The reader greenamerican advises:

The point is, you won’t miss anything important by disconnecting for a day or two. If you have social media push notifications, be sure to turn them off so you won’t be tempted to log in.

Remember your beloved

If your mother, child, or partner is dead, Mother’s Day can be excruciating.

If you’ve lost your mom, you can find comfort in remembering her and everything she meant to you on Mother’s Day. PhlegmFatale offers:

You don’t have to engrave a bench to pay tribute to your mom. Visiting where she is buried, listening to her favorite music, sharing stories with family, or just taking a moment to stop and think about her are all ways that can help you get through the day.

If you’ve lost a child, the AVDawn reader has a recommendation:

If you have lost your partner who was a mother, you might consider spending Sunday celebrating them with your children. Depending on the age of the children, you can ask them to help them figure out how to spend the day.

Note another mother figure in your life

Mothers are not always our biological mothers: many of us have someone else in our life, for example, an aunt who always answers the phone, guides us in choosing our career, or a neighbor who watches over us. Focus on the mother figures in your life and acknowledge everything they do for you. NopeNopejustNope says:

If you know you’ll be spending the holiday with your partner’s mom, but don’t consider her a mother figure, HesterMofet has a trick to help you reimagine the day and get through it:

If you don’t have a mother figure to celebrate, you can expand your definition of what a mother is to women in general. You can volunteer at a women’s shelter or other organization, or send text messages to important women in your life.

Self-service practice

Taking care of yourself is important at all times, but if the day is tough for you, it is very important. Plan a day full of your favorite activities, such as a marathon of your favorite movies with your favorite snacks. Or indulge in something new, like taking an art class or a new hiking trail. The goal is to distract yourself with what you like. Reader Lars Vargas needs $ 20 million, and sleep offers a different approach : treat it like any other day and go about your weekend routine.

Whether you decide to do something special or not, you can still focus on the good things in your life, as whatdidyousay11 suggests:

Whether your mom is dead, you don’t have a good relationship with your mother, or you can’t be and want to, knowing that you are not alone and having multiple ways to handle the holiday will hopefully help.

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