How to Conserve Energy When Full of Stress
I don’t know about you, but my world has gotten a little more tense since … let’s say last November. Even without the constant news updates – and the time I spend reading them, along with various Twitter threads that try to theorize them – I have a lot to manage and balance in my life: I work part-time as an editor, my debut The novel comes out in May this year, and I do assignments for several freelance writers, teach writing lessons, and am a volunteer tutor. (And that’s just work.)
A friend recently asked me how I conserve energy with all this potential stress; after all, I am still meeting my work deadlines, I am still meeting my personal goals, and I still sleep (although I don’t always sleep well).
In part, this has to do with optimization and automation – making effective to-do lists, turning habits into routines, handing over tasks to applications, and tracking them in spreadsheets.
But I think the real reason I stay awake – that doesn’t mean I’m always happy or stress-free, just keep moving forward – has to do with a lifelong habit of prioritizing and practicing.
Practice doesn’t make life perfect, but it does help you get things done.
My parents are musicians with a classical education, which means that I grew up as a musician with a classical education (piano, French horn, vocals). More importantly, I learned how to practice.
When you practice something, you not only repeat the same scales or arpeggios every day, you also repeat the act of practice every day. The idea that you sit with your instrument for 30 minutes or an hour or more is something that happens every day. Usually at the same time, because it’s easier to think, “I’m training at 7:30 pm,” than asking yourself every day when are you going to do this.
And, of course, you won’t train every day. Some days are holidays. Sometimes a friend comes to you from another city. Sometimes you have extra homework, or your boss asked you to stay late, or your kids are hosting an event, or your editor wants you to rewrite at the last minute.
But the idea is that you know what a typical day looks like and what you will be doing during that day and how you will prioritize your time. For me, a typical day includes 20 minutes of yoga in the morning. It includes a breakfast of ½ cup oatmeal, ¼ cup raisins, 1 tablespoon chopped almonds, ½ banana, 1 teaspoon olive oil, and 1 teaspoon honey.
Knowing this information – specifically, knowing what a typical day in my life looks like – helps me spend less time thinking about what I need to do during the day, and more time thinking about it. It also helps me recognize when I’ve had too many “irregular days,” which usually happens when stress starts to build up and when I need to start thinking about what aspect of my life is causing this stress and how I can fix it.
But knowing what I want on a typical day – for example, enough time to practice yoga in the morning – means choosing what to do first.
We all have different priorities, so we must give them priority.
My career is the top priority in my life. I don’t work, I don’t eat. I’ve also worked enough jobs to understand the value of building a career and the freedom it has to offer. I was a telemarketer. I was the secretary. I stuffed envelopes and stayed in the office after office hours to make photocopies for the boss. I like my current career a lot more, and I am going to continue to invest in it.
So, since I have chosen “career” as my top priority, everything else gets priority based on his ability to support my career. You may have a different top priority; There have been times in my life when “relationships” were my top priority, and you don’t need me to tell you that many people build their lives based, for example, on their ability to maintain “family” priority. (You also don’t need me to tell you that the modern workplace often doesn’t recognize that people have different priorities, but that’s another topic.)
In my case, physical health is another important priority. It’s not just that freelance writers aren’t paid sick leave; Also, I work best if I eat well, drink plenty of water, and do daily exercise. I also try to spend eight hours in bed every night, even if that doesn’t always correspond to eight hours of sleep. (There is a difference between priority and control.)
While it sounds like I have to spend a lot of energy balancing it all, the truth is, I don’t. What you prioritize is actually what you least think about because it becomes part of your day. I spend most of my days in the same foods that I chose because they fit my calorie needs, my macros, and my budget – yes, I’m one of those people who pay attention to their food macros – and which I can cook in less than five minutes each. I know how this food will affect my body because I have eaten it many times before; I won’t have a sugar crash or an increase in carbs, and since I know which food combinations help me stay full, I don’t even need to think about eating between meals.
Instead, I have the energy to focus on other things – most often at work, but also friendships, playing Stardew Valley , the book I’m reading ( 4 3 2 1 by Paul Auster , if you’re interested) – things that make ordinary days interesting.
Making my priorities into daily practice also makes my life less stressful. I want to point out that even though there is a correlation between regular exercise and stress reduction, for example, I am not saying that everyone needs to take their 10,000 steps (or 15,000 if you will ), because I understand that everyone has different priorities . Stress for me arises when I do not know what will happen to me, and when I feel that I will not say what is happening to me. (This is, without a doubt, one of the reasons why we have all been under such stress since November.) Setting priorities, even if I don’t know what’s coming next, helps me focus on what I want to do.
Know When To Satisfy And When To Maximize
I learned the terms “satisfying” and “maximizer” from Project Happiness by Gretchen Rubin , and they changed the way I think about priority setting and decision making.
Some solutions are maximized or optimized to get the best possible result: What do I need to do to increase my freelance earnings year after year? What do I need to do an hour before bed to get the desired amount of sleep?
Other solutions are satisfactory or unequivocally accepted: I don’t need you to tell me about the benefits of steel oats over swift oats, because I don’t care. Quick oatmeal is quick and cheap, I like it and I don’t worry about missing a better oatmeal somewhere.
You can bet on oatmeal or your favorite brand of olive oil, other than the Safeway Select, and I say again, that’s what we give priority, it does not matter. The act of prioritizing – choosing what to maximize, what to satisfy, and what to practice – matters.
So let’s get back to our current political situation, because I hinted at it from the very beginning. I, like many of you, are very concerned about what may happen in the near future and in the somewhat longer term. I could easily spend every evening reading a hundred different articles, hoping to find clues that suggest that we will all be safe, that we have nothing to worry about.
And I’ve been doing this for a while, and I’ve had too many irregular days. So I asked myself what needs to be changed and decided that I need to figure out what actions I can take to help: I could call my representatives ( what works ), I could make charitable donations that fit within my budget, I could march. and I could continue to visit the children I teach.
That would be enough. I wouldn’t ask myself every day what to do, because I already knew – and if I could do something else, for example, vote in the upcoming elections, I would have heard about it. on Twitter, Wall of Us or 5Calls.org and I could do it. Besides, it’s out of my control. (Again: there is a difference between priority and control.)
This is how I conserve energy in stressful situations. Physically, there is sleep, a walk, and a lot of water , but I think it is the mental decisions that really matter. I focus on what I want and what I can do, my choices and my boundaries, my priorities and my practice.
In conclusion, I want to point out that today could be difficult. I didn’t sleep well last night because I made the mistake of checking my email right before bed and saw a work letter that I had been thinking about all night; I received another work letter that I needed to answer this morning, which I try not to do; plus I have to work late because the source I want to interview is only available in the evening.
And yet I did yoga, I ate oatmeal, and I feel great. I’m not afraid to work late because it doesn’t happen often, and I know that if it starts every day, I’ll start looking for something I can change. I feel energized, ready, satisfied . Today I will have less free time, but I will also not check my email before bed, and tomorrow I will wake up, eat my favorite breakfast and start my practice again.