Manage Your Temperament Around Rude People by Finding Their “pin”
When you are surrounded by assholes, it is difficult to refrain from turning into them yourself . To stay calm in the face of someone’s tantrum, find their pin.
This School of Life video discusses what we wrote about earlier: how to deal with rude people and not let them change their attitude and behavior. The video introduces an interesting concept by the French philosopher Emile-Auguste Chartier:
He developed a formula to calm himself and his students in the face of annoying people. “Never say that people are evil,” he wrote, “you just need to look for a pin.” He meant finding the source of the agony that makes a person behave horribly. a comforting thought is to imagine that they are suffering offstage in an area that we cannot see. Being mature means learning to imagine this pain zone, despite the lack of much available evidence.
You, of course, also do not want to be a trifle. The idea is not to justify someone’s bad behavior or let them step on you. The idea is simply to understand that there is probably a reason for their rude behavior, and you can use that empathy to keep yourself from being angry and rude.
You can find more informationon the Chartier “badge” here , as well as watch the rest of the video above, or follow the link below.
How To Stay Calm With People | School of Life (YouTube)