Amazing Things No One Tells You About Childbirth
No matter how you prepare for the birth of a child, there is a possibility that something unexpected will happen. Some mothers had great orgasms during childbirth , while others were more excruciating. Here are the harsh secrets of childbirth, from out-of-control poop to the need for new shoes.
Childbirth is just a short chunk of the entire parenting experience: a few hours or a day of birth versus months of pregnancy and decades of parenting. Because of this, we usually only get the Cliff Notes version of the genders, rather than the small and often embarrassing details. No two births are alike, but it’s best to prepare yourself for one of these “things nobody talks about” that might happen to you.
You could be in childbirth and did not know about it at all
Do you know the classic movie scenes where a pregnant woman’s water suddenly gushes out? In fact, this does not happen with many women. According to a Babycenter survey , up to 19% of expectant mothers are more prone to a slow leak or trickle than severe flooding. Apparently, the water can also break through twice , which was a funny surprise. In addition, while draining water may be a sign that you are going to have labor, many women have labor before the water drains – and sometimes the caregiver has to tear open the amniotic sac to stimulate and speed up labor.
Some mothers didn’t even feel painful contractions before giving birth. The Babicenter forums are full of stories about women who didn’t know they were in labor , including this one posted by gracie’smom393:
With my first one, I was a job and just felt out of place. I called the maternity service and asked how Labor was feeling. I didn’t have painful contractions, I just felt out of my mind. They told me, “Oh honey, you will know when you have a baby.” I decided I was just working too hard and went back to other business. Several hours later, I was still feeling ill, but no pain. I called the “Childbirth” service and asked how the childbirth was feeling. A new person told me the same thing. So, I just ignored it.
At around 20:40 I called the customer and my water ran out. Surprise, I’ve been out all day. I found a client and headed to the hospital. I was 4 years old, and a few hours later she was born.
Twitter user Insert nombre acui adds:
On the one hand, we could envy these women with their almost painless experience, but on the other hand, it’s nice to have a warning about the imminent birth of your child. In addition to the well-known signs that you may be in labor soon (eg, contractions, draining water, “ bloody show ”), listen to your body for changes, such as feeling particularly tired or energized, weak joints, back pain, and other lesser known signs of labor .
Labor itself is truly surreal
Regardless of whether you get an epidural or not, expect to feel a little “out of hand” during labor. You are experiencing many physical sensations and emotions. (This also applies to mom’s partner.)
For me, the contractions were like waves of very intense gas pain, or like a bowling ball bouncing on my womb every now and then – the ball got heavier with each contraction. Others describe it as menstrual cramps, ” like the gnomes grip my stomach in a hot vise, ” or as if you’re about to poop and can’t stop it . As they get stronger, you can’t think of anything else – it’s just you and the contractions. My husband kept asking me if I was okay and I could hardly nod to him.
The biggest surprise for me was that I learned in the hospital that my daughter was in breech position with her butt pointing down instead of her usual head-first position. This meant an emergency caesarean section. Therefore, I cannot tell you what a vaginal birth is, but a cesarean section is unrealistic. First, there is severe pain and coldness from the injection of anesthesia into the spine, and then lying awake, staring at the lower half of your body, blocked by a screen. I felt the doctors pull and feel me in my stomach, which was not painful, but not entirely comfortable, and at times it seemed to me that I was suffocating and could not breathe. Fortunately, the operation ended faster than I expected.
There may be a strange odor in the delivery room, too, perhaps more noticeable to people who are not engaged in active labor. Ross Thompson shares this beautiful description:
David Fickchema, however, describes the smell as earthy : “The only element not seen in prenatal classes is smell; not unpleasant (unless mom poops), but earthy; blood, sweat, tears. “
Some vaginal women have had a very stressful labor, enough to break the tailbone or cause tears in the perineum and vagina . However, many women told Parents Magazine that when they got to the pushing stage, the worst was over . For many of them, it was like having a bowel movement with intense burning sensation. Some women actually poop during labor or even vomit , but that’s okay, so don’t worry about it. Women in labor and nurses and doctors have seen all this, and at the moment you will not care.
If you haven’t studied much about childbirth, you might also be surprised 15-20 minutes after the baby is born. There is a third stage of labor, the afterbirth , when the mother’s body expels the placenta. When the baby is born, it is still not over. Some mothers eat the placenta, which we hear is surprisingly tasty .
Again, no two work experiences are the same, so don’t be intimidated by all of this. Once you pick up your baby, you can forget about the pain you just experienced. After all, many (lucky) women have quick and / or easy labor.
You will need more time to recover and connect than you might expect
Here’s a little secret that not all parents share because it’s wrong: you may not feel anything for your newborn when you first meet him or her. But this is not wrong, it is completely normal. Our very own Beth Skareki shares:
It was not like love at first sight, it was like: (1) relief from the fact that the birth is END, thank God, holy shit; (2) holds this heavy, slightly slimy creature, and he does not know what he is doing, and I also do not know what I am doing; (3) over the next few hours, just be more and more excited about “God, I have my own baby!” … I bet anything, somewhere there is a hormonal surge, which rises in parallel, because by the morning or, anyway, after many hours I am completely in love. It seems that people sometimes worry about when / how / whether or not they are “attached” to their child, so it would be nice to know that it can happen this way. On the subject: I had so much energy after giving birth that people asked me if I was sleeping, and I answered: WHO CARES.
As for me, I couldn’t even hold my daughter after her birth due to the operation, so my husband just held her in front of my face. I felt removed instead of a rush of love or joy, maybe because of drugs or the shock of what had just happened, and then I myself was carried off to the recovery room. It took me at least two weeks and a lot of pain relievers to recover enough to be able to move around easily, but it didn’t take me long to start adoring my girl. It takes time.
Although those who give birth via the vaginal canal are usually discharged from the hospital earlier than those who had a caesarean section (one to two nights instead of three or more), this does not mean that recovery is also a walk in the park for them. Some people told me that they were surprised at how inflamed they were all over, needing ice packs and squirting a bottle to heal swollen vaginas or wait about 10 days for a wound to heal and stitches to dissolve, for example. Some people experience bladder problems even several months after giving birth. (Doctors may recommend doing Kegel exercises to strengthen your pelvic floor muscles.)
In addition, here are a few things you can ask for or buy before leaving the hospital: a new pair of shoes a size or two larger than you usually wear, a bottle of Colace stool softener, and possibly a mild laxative. The last two are because the first bowel movement after giving birth through the vaginal birth canal can be excruciatingly painful , or prescription pain relievers can help. Maybe this is too much information, but a few days after returning from the hospital, I realized that I had not pooped, and trying to do it was one of the most painful experiences I have ever experienced, such as trying to pass stones or even glass.
You may need a new pair of shoes due to bloating. No one ever told me that I would be so bloated that I could not fit into my old shoes (I ended up cutting off the back of my boots to have something to walk in). Beth says she was told it was due to intravenous fluids and that “there were no shoes on the ground that would fit my leg when I was discharged from the hospital.”
When you get home, you will quickly go through children’s boot camp , including what no one tells you about breastfeeding . I think we can consider pregnancy and childbirth surprises as just a practice to be surprised as parents for the rest of our lives. As descriptive and perhaps disturbing as many of the things we’ve covered above, most parents agree that it was worth it. Some even do it multiple times!