How to Cheat Your Way Through the Super Bowl Without Knowing Anything About Football
The Super Bowl is Sunday and this is how an ancient tradition begins where people who don’t give a damn about football or the teams involved get together to watch a big match. If you want to have fun without getting drunk and eating nachos for five hours, here’s everything you need to know to get through it.
Get to know the simpler version of the rules of football
First of all, let’s go over the basics of this particular Super Bowl. This is Super Bowl 50, and this zero-scoring big five is sure to be showing off all day. The two teams this year are the Denver Broncos, who will be wearing white jerseys , and the Carolina Panthers, who will be wearing their black jerseys .
At its core, football is pretty straightforward, but the NFL loves to introduce all kinds of crazy rules that complicate things. Fortunately, the rules change so often that the color commentators explain everything in some detail throughout the game, especially during the Super Bowl. If you closely follow what is happening, you will learn most of these rules. However, this year there is one important rule change that is sure to be talked about, so you will want to understand the change in shots with extra points.
Until this year, the extra point after a team scores a touchdown was a really light shot from the two yard line. It was boring, so the NFL changed the rule. Now, to get an extra point, the kicker starts from the 15-yard line, which is a little more difficult. It doesn’t seem to matter much, but the missing extra point is partly the reason the Broncos are initially in the Super Bowl , so there will be a lot of talk about it.
In addition, the funny video above introduces you to the basic rules of football, just enough to enjoy the game. If you don’t like the videos, this Football Girl Rules Guide is a quick read to get you up to speed quickly.
Learn some “important” conversation topics
Want to talk before the big game? It’s really easy this year because both teams have a great cast of characters. Let’s go over the big ones:
- Peyton Manning is old and decrepit : Peyton Manning, Broncos quarterback, 39, or 456 years old in soccer. After injuries at the start of the season, he is now held together with ribbons . That doesn’t mean he’s still not the best quarterback, he might be, but rumors that this will be his last season , and subsequently his last Super Bowl, you will surely hear a lot of talk about his age.
- Omaha: Speaking of Peyton Manning, if a footballer ever had a catchphrase, it would be Manning’s scream of Omaha. He shouts this on the scrimmage line, although the exact meaning of the word “Omaha” is still under debate . However, expect to be mentioned a lot while playing, and if you’re surrounded by Broncos fans expect to be yelled at at random times.
- Cam Newton is an adorable dancing machine: Carolina Panthers quarterback Cam Newton is one of the most photogenic footballers in the history of the game .He also loves to dance when he does something noticeable . If he’s not dancing, he’ll make a Superman move . In addition, when he scores a touchdown, he passes the ball to a touchdown fan of the Panthers in the stands . In fact, even if you’re not into football at all, watching Cam Newton do just about anything is a pleasure. Also, if you’re wondering, Newton is 26 years old and the age difference between him and Manning is bound to appear at least once.
- Both defenses are incredible: you don’t really need to study every defensive player, but know this: both the Denver Broncos and the Carolina Panthers have two of the best defenses in the league. As for the Panthers, one of the notable players is midfielder Luke Kuchly. If you hear the crowd chanting “Luuuuuuukkke”, this is for him. As for the Broncos, there is no player-specific chant here (butmaybe someone will fire it up for von Miller’s chicken farm ), but for some reason fans love to scream “Completed” when the opponent’s quarterback misses a pass.
This is of course the Super Bowl, so anything really is possible, like last year when a playeryou probably never heard of won a game for the Patriots in the final seconds.
Know who is having fun when
Super Cups are only partly about real football. They are also about entertainment. So, you know better who is performing this year.
Lady Gaga will sing “The Star-Spangled Banner” before the game begins. The Super Bowl is set to kick off at 6:30 EST / 3:30 pm PST, so if you want to catch Lady Gaga, tune in about 10 minutes in advance.
Next up is a halftime show. The average duration of the Super Bowl is about three hours and twenty minutes, not counting the post-match show. The average break time is about 12-13 minutes, but in general, the break is about 30 minutes. That is, it is not possible to accurately time the timing, but you can expect to see the show on hiatus after 8:00 PM EST / 5:00 PM PST.
Rock pioneer dad Coldplay is taking hiatus from the show this year, but Beyoncé will be joining them as a guest and will probably show them in some way. Bruno Mars is also set to make a guest appearance. In addition to these three, at some point, an unexpected guest is likely to appear. Missy Elliott stole the show last year. This year, there are rumors of Jay-Z and Rihanna who have collaborated with Coldplay in the past. Rumor has it that Justin Timberlake is also for some reason . Anyway, let’s hope this is at least half as crazyas last year’s halftime show .
Who to bet on
Let’s get rid of the boring part of Super Bowl betting: The Carolina Panthers take a bigger advantage than the Broncos. Now the line in Carolina is about -5.5 . What does it mean? Basically, if you want a good chance of winning money, bet on Panthers. If you prefer to win big or just love to root for the underdog, then the Denver Broncos is your team.
Now let’s take a look at some of the bets this year. Promotional bets are, in essence, bets on random events that will occur during the game, bets on strange entertainment, and much more. Hell, for some reason people even bet on coin toss. Anyway, let’s take a look at some of the dumbest from SBNation .
- What color will Beyoncé’s shoes be when she takes the stage for the halftime show? Chances are 3/2 that he’ll be black, if you’re wondering.
- Who will the Super Bowl MVP mention first? The odds are 2/1 for both God and the team, so keep an eye out for that, he’ll be close.
- Will there be an earthquake during the game? The probability is 10/1 that the answer is yes, which, given the unpredictability of earthquakes, seems oddly high.
- Will “Left Shark” appear on stage during the Super Bowl halftime show? The Left Shark was a phenomenon in the last Super Bowl , but do you think it will be back? The odds are 15/1.
In fact, maintenance bets can be about anything game-related or not, so if you’re watching a game with a group of friends, shell out some money for whatever stakes you can think of.
Props betting isn’t the only way to place Super Bowl bets. Pools are also a popular way to throw money away, especially if you work in an office. There are many variations of Super Bowl pools, but most of the time it is a 10×10 grid with numbers, and prizes are awarded to those with the same number as the square at the end of the quarter and at the end of the game. Good news: you don’t need to know anything about football to win the pool.
Consumer Reports has some of the basic tips for choosing the numbers in your pool. First, don’t worry about numbers that end in two, because football results almost never end in two. Apart from that, here are a couple of their tips:
If you are buying multiple squares, do not select one row or column. From a cold, probabilistic point of view, it doesn’t matter which squares you choose – before numbers are assigned to the grid, each square will have the same value. If you end up acquiring half of the squares in the Super Bowl pool where the Denver Broncos score ends at 6, you will have a very specific root interest.
Sevens and zeros are not what they used to be. Thanks for the two-point conversion. The NFL reintroduced the two-point conversion in 1994, which led to squad coaches carrying conversion tables and making 20-17 finals slightly less common. In addition, extra points are no longer a requirement in the NFL – one of 18 extra points has been missed this season.
At the same time, you can at least increase your probability of winning in this pool.
All ads likely to be talked about on Monday
The Super Bowl ad makes a big difference as companies pay $ 5 million to run a 30-second ad during this year’s game. The ads tend to be silly enough that they are a sight to behold on their own, not to mention the actual sporting event taking place near them.
Fun fact, though: you can watch most of the ads without even looking at the Super Bowl, and there have been plenty of commercials already released. Here is at least one extensive list of some of them . More importantly, the ones that generate the most buzz include Budweiser’s Helen Mirren ad, T-Mobile’s Drake ad, Pokemon ad, and this incredibly whimsical Heinz ad .
It’s hard to say exactly which ads will have the most impact on people during the game itself, and while there are already a lot of them, some surprises still await. So never leave your room so you don’t miss anything. Don’t go to the bathroom. Don’t take another beer. Do not refill the crisp bowl. Follow these guidelines and you should catch everything that is said about the ad.
Or just wait and watch them on YouTube.