Do It Tonight, Same Sex Couples: Play the Comparison Game for Better Sex

Today we have an assignment for those of you who sleep with people who have the same things going on between your legs as you do. This is a simple game that will help you better understand what each of you like about the bedroom.

Why do you have to do this tonight

Gay sex can be great because you have at least a basic understanding of each other’s anatomy and how things work. The genital learning curve isn’t as steep as long as you have the same set of parts.

On the other hand, however, it’s easier to make assumptions about what the other person will like based on what you like. Of course, having sex with another person is a different experience than having sex with yourself (and there are certain things you could never possibly do with yourself unless you are very flexible), but still the feeling proximity.

If you have been with the specified pair of matching genitals for a while, you may also have fallen into the routine of your sexual time. This happens to almost all couples, regardless of gender and orientation. We keep doing the same old things and don’t put much effort into learning new methods.

Today’s “Do It Tonight” makes it easy, informative and fun to discern what each of you really like and discover some new tricks along the way.

How to do it

First, both of you should read this article so you both know what the deal is. Agree on a specific time to play (hopefully tonight, as you know this is our Do It Tonight series).

Pick a body part that you both like to touch. Try to ease your way with non-genital, non-pectoral, and non-gluteal areas such as your back or shoulders. First, try to replicate the type of touch that your partner has always responded to best. For example, you can start lightly scratching their backs with your nails. Say something like, “Okay, I think this is what you like best.” It’s okay if your partner has some edits, like “I usually like a little more pressure” or “I like a little less.” Any feedback any of you has to offer will help you learn more about your body and what you enjoy.

Then try to simulate the type of touch you like best, for example, you can start massaging your partner’s back. Say, “This is what I like best.” Again, your partner is free to express their thoughts, for example, “You usually react when I walk a little faster.”

Half the fun of playing is honing what each of you like, so keep switching between “this is what you like” and “this is what I like.” Let’s talk about the similarities and differences. It should feel light and playful, so feel free to joke.

Using the same scheme, move on to kissing, handwork, blowjobs, or other activities that are usually part of your repertoire. You can view all your favorite activities in one big session, or split it up and do one task every day (Monday for makeup, Tuesday for tits, etc.).

In the case of oral sex in particular, it can be surprisingly difficult for you to reproduce what you like. Sometimes it’s hard to imagine what the hell your partner is actually doing in there between your legs. This is a great opportunity to teach each other the specific techniques you are using.

Keep in mind that in some cases, you may end up not at all in what you think your partner likes the most. You can feel a prick of embarrassment if your SO says something like, “Actually, I like a lot more like this.” Oops. This is usually due to our aforementioned tendency to get on track with our partners and keep doing the same thing over and over. It’s okay if you’re a little embarrassed, but remember to come back to this game to freshen up!

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