How to Eat These Sloppy Foods Without Spoiling Yourself
Whether it’s a hamburger the size of your head or a massive plate of hot wings, some foods are best eaten alone in a dark corner. You can just be an adult and not order this food in public, or you can master the art of eating sloppy food in public. Here’s how to do it.
Use the claw to eat a hamburger
Burgers are the staple of restaurants and barbecues, but eating them gracefully can be a waste of time when in filled jam. However, with proper storage, even the most ungrateful of us can avoid leakage.
Our friends at Kotaku point to “claw” as the best way to eat a hamburger , and in my experience it works better than most others. Hold the burger with your thumbs and little fingers on the bottom and your middle three fingers on the top. You can then rotate the burger (as opposed to moving in a straight line) to minimize spillage. It might not work perfect for this half-pound bacon and avocado, but it will help in most cases.
Remove chicken wings before eating, or learn to eat with one hand
You have two reliable ways to eat chicken wings without making a fool of yourself, and both work equally well. It just depends on how you want to fit your wings.
Generally, the preferred method of eating the wings without clutter is to remove the bones first. This prevents the inevitable puffiness in the sauce that accompanies the eating of the wings straight off the bones. Take the flat part of the wing, then find a small bone. Wiggle and twist to pull out. Do the same for the larger bone. Now you can just eat it.
If this is too much work for you, then you can simply grasp the bowl with wings with one hand. All you have to do is grab the larger end of the wing with one hand and then press down on the meat from above. You can then eat it all off the bone, while keeping your other hand clean for the inevitable subsequent high fives.
Eat chips, chitos, and other snacks with chopsticks
This is something of a Lifehacker classic , especially since our very own Whitson Gordon swears by it , but it’s still worth mentioning again. If you are going to eat fatty foods such as chips or Cheetos, do so with chopsticks to keep your fingers clean.
Cut off the ends of the watermelon rind
For some reason, the traditional method of slicing a watermelon makes it nearly impossible to eat without soaking yourself in watermelon juice. Fortunately, there are better methods.
If the watermelon has already been cut into four pieces, you can simply cut off the ends as shown in the video above. This keeps the center intact, so you will have something to hold onto, but you won’t get the melon on your face.
Also, if you are cooking a watermelon, cut it into chopsticks instead of slices. This way, no one will look like a fool and you will become the hero of many upcoming barbecues.
Take a bite on top of the dumplings in the soup before eating.
Chinese soup dumplings are delicious lumps of explosive liquid that can ruin your shirt and mouth if you’re not careful. At Zagat, they suggest you approach these soup dumplings carefully so as not to burn the palate and splash on your shirt.
Start by taking the dumplings very slowly with your chopsticks so as not to rip off the bottom, then place the dumplings knot up on a spoon. Right now, you tend to put it all in your mouth in the first place, but don’t do it. Instead, bite off the top knot to let the steam escape and then pump out the broth. Once the broth is no more broth, dip it in soy sauce and eat the skins.