A Women’s Guide to Knowing Your Genitals

About 30% of my clients have never paid attention to what is happening between their legs . About 75% have some misinformation or misconception about their genitals. And almost all of my clients feel insecure or ashamed of some aspect of the most intimate areas of their body. Here’s your guide on how to get out of these statistics and befriend your crotch.

If you have a vagina, you’ve been taught that it looks weird, smells weird, tastes weird, and overall weird. Sometimes you might even be a little confused. But you probably want your genitals to feel good too, right? It is difficult for both speakers to exist at the same time. If you want to experience pleasure and orgasm, let alone be proud of your body, you need to have a certain level of comfort with it.

Make a date with yourself

First, let’s get to know your feminine pieces. It doesn’t matter if you’ve done it before; If you are unable to draw an exact copy of your genitals from memory, it may be helpful for you to take another look. If this bothers you, try relaxing by taking a few deep breaths, drinking a glass of wine, or making an appointment when you know you will have uninterrupted privacy. Try to find the most comfortable position for your body that will allow you to pry. Depending on your physical capabilities, you may need a hand-held mirror, props, or creative positioning.

What to look for

We’re now going to go on a treasure hunt to explore some of the major parts of your anatomy. After reading the description, try to find this part on your own body. Whoever finds them all will receive a prize!

  • Pubis : Let’s start at the top. The pubic bone is the area that lies on top of the pubic bone. It is covered in pubic hair. You are probably the most familiar with this part as it is the part that you see when you look down.
  • Outer and inner labia: Your pubis divides into two outer labia, which are also covered with pubic hair. You also have an inner pair of labia, which is hairless and made from more delicate tissues. When it comes to labia, there is an incredible variety. The labia can be brown, brown, pink, black, red, purple, or cream. Some women have larger outer labia, while others have larger inner ones. There is no “normal”, so don’t worry about how yours looks!
  • Clitoris : If you trace the line of your inner labia upwards, you will find a small spot where the tissues converge. This area is home to the clitoris, a small piece of skin that contains virtually all of the nerve endings in your genitals. Some women will be able to notice the clitoris immediately, while others will need to search a little. The clitoris is usually hidden under the clitoral hood, which is a thin layer of skin. You may need to pull back the hood to see the clitoris.
  • Urethral opening : Right below the clitoris is the urethral opening, which is the opening from which you urinate. It is a very small hole, so you cannot see it with your eyes.
  • Vagina : Beyond is the opening of the vagina, which leads to a magical place known as the vagina. The vaginal canal is the place of any kind of penetration, as well as the place from which menstrual fluid flows out and from which babies are born. Your vagina is closed off by the cervix, which then opens into the uterus, fallopian tubes, and ovaries.
  • G-spot : Oh, G- spot . Is there any structure in the female anatomy that is more controversial? Many doctors and researchers insist that the G-spot does exist, while others fervently swear that the “G-spot sensation” that some women experience is just stimulation of the inner fibers of the clitoris. Some say that every woman has a G-spot, others believe that only some women have it. It seems absurd that there is no definite answer to this question yet, but this dispute is not exhausted here. I can tell you that the G-spot is named after the doctor who originally discovered it: Grafenberg . If you want to find your (possibly already existing) G-spot, insert your finger into the vaginal canal, palm up. Your G-spot is on the front wall of your vagina, which is the side closest to your belly, not the side closest to your back. It is about the size of a coin, dense and porous. It protrudes from the vaginal wall, so you can usually say you’ve found it.
  • Perineum : This area is a smooth strip of skin between the opening of the vagina and the anus.
  • Anus : You may need to maneuver a little to look at your anus. It is best to bend at the waist in front of the mirror and spread your cheeks with your hands. A surprisingly apt nickname for the “balloon knot”. The anus is surrounded by nerve endings and can be a lot of fun to play with.

You can read more and also check out some handy charts on the Wikipedia page for the vulva .

Find what you like

As you examine each area of ​​your body, try experimenting with different types of touching that point. See if you can find all the pleasant ways to stimulate each part of your genitals. You may like the gentle pinching of the outer labia, circular motions around the clitoris, and light pressure on the anus. This kind of exploration can literally take a lifetime and is the best way to develop a more pleasant relationship with your body! And the more comfortable you are with it, the better your sex will be.

(Almost) everything you need to know about your genitals

Now that you are a little more familiar with anatomy, let’s talk about things that can happen inside, around, and with your genitals.

Pleasure and orgasm

This is undoubtedly the funniest thing about female roles. Women have about three times as many nerves in the clitoris as in the middle penis, so our ability to have fun is much higher! (Sorry guys.) We are also capable of multiple orgasms.

The clitoris is the center of the orgasmic universe for most women. For most women, an area of ​​the clitoris, such as the surface or upper left quadrant, appears to be more sensitive than the rest of the clitoris. Repetitive stimulation of the clitoris usually results in orgasm.

However, a fun little thing for parties is that the clitoris is much larger than most people think. The visible part of the clitoris can range from a small pea to an inch or more, but in reality the clitoris extends into your body and splits into two legs, much like a wishbone ! Most sex researchers believe that stimulation of the inner parts of the clitoris can lead to orgasm, as can stimulating the outer part. The implications of this relatively recent discovery are enormous. The vast majority of women cannot orgasm from penetration alone, and virtually all of these women feel guilty and lack the ability to do so. I am trying to remind my clients that women who can have penetration orgasms are simply getting the inside of their clitoris stimulated. It is still stimulating the clitoris, just different parts of it!


Your vagina also has a tremendous amount of stretch (remember, it’s for newborns!). The vagina also goes through a fascinating process known as “stretching,” where the muscles in the vagina help the uterus to lift up to make more room for penetration. Fortunately, the vagina is also designed to return to normal after all this stretch. Many women are embarrassed about their perceived vaginal “looseness”. Without seeing your vagina, I can assure you that absolutely everything is in order with your muscle tone.

However, if you want better control of your muscles, try Kegel exercises. Contract the muscles you are using to block the flow of urine, then relax and repeat. You can also get a nifty toy like the KGoal to help you develop a workout regimen!

Pubic hair care

Pubic hair care is an important part of your relationship with your genitals. Pubic hairstyles change all the time, but it’s worth noting that pubic hair doesn’t just appear: it helps prevent chafing during intercourse. If you decide to remove all or part of your pubic hair (which, of course, is not necessary!), Be sure to contact a trusted specialist in a hygiene salon. It seems that shugaring is the most easy-to-skin method of hair removal. The most commonly used hair removal method is shaving, but it can lead to rather unpleasant razor burns and ingrown hairs.


If you insert your finger into your vagina, you can probably feel the natural lubrication that your body exudes through the walls of the vagina. When you are aroused, your vagina releases more lubricant to make penetration easier (even if penetration is not your plug). Women vary greatly in the amount of lubricant produced, and the amount of lubricant can vary with cycle and age. Getting “enough” is another of the myriad ways women feel stressed and inadequate, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with getting a little help from artificial lubrication . In fact, adding more lubricant is almost always more fun!

To fire

The lubrication process takes place all the time, so, unfortunately, having a vagina means a discharge. Most women are embarrassed to find moisture in their underwear at the end of the day, but rest assured that this is completely normal. The vagina is an adorable little ecosystem that does a great job of keeping itself clean and at the correct pH.

If you insert your finger into your vagina, you can probably feel the natural lubrication that your body exudes through the walls of the vagina. Your body is always producing natural lubrication. It fluctuates throughout your cycle, so there are days when you have a lot more secretion than others and times of the month when your secretion looks different.

There is absolutely NO need to douche or wash the interior surfaces with soap. In fact, it will actually do much more harm than good to your vagina as it will kill the beneficial bacteria your vagina needs to stay healthy. You will know that something is wrong with your vagina if your discharge is thick and lumpy, noticeably different in color, or has a very strong odor.


Just as the G-spot is the source of a lot of controversy, so is squirting (also known as female ejaculation). Some sex therapists believe that all women are capable of squirting, others believe that this is a rare occurrence. This is another question that seems to have already been answered, but there is still debate about the exact identity of the fluid that is released when a woman injects.

Women who squirt usually report that they need G-spot stimulation to do this. G-spot usually requires very intense stimulation. This is why I recommend hefty toys like the njoy Pure Wand if you want to experiment with them. When you start stimulating the G-spot, you may feel like you need to go to the toilet at first. Don’t worry – this will go away if you keep walking and you will have a more pleasant, non-urinary sensation. You may be oozing fluid, but it will not be like sitting on the toilet and urinating. Put a towel on the bed if you like, but don’t worry about anything but a pleasant sensation!


You probably learned the basics of menstruation in a sweaty gym when you were in elementary school, but there are still many women who are unsure of what is “normal” and what is “abnormal” when it comes to menstruation. It is recommended to talk to your doctor if you notice any sudden changes in your period, if you do not spend a long time (months at a time) without it, if you have bleeding (“spotting”) or if you have another complete period between normal periods. periods, or if you have such heavy periods that you find it difficult to change tampons quickly enough.

Speaking of tampons, change them every eight hours and try to find unbleached cotton tampons (or switch to the Diva Cup ). Tampon users may be susceptible to toxic shock syndrome due to over-absorbing tampons being left on for too long, but TSS is quite rare these days.

Yeast infections

A delicate bacterial balance is maintained in the vagina. Introducing harmful bacteria or killing good strains can lead to infection. Here are some simple tips for avoiding yeast infections:

  • Wipe from front to back.
  • Take probiotics when you need to take antibiotics (antibiotics kill good bacteria in the vagina as well as bad bacteria that cause nausea)
  • Never put anything in your butt in your vagina without first cleaning it.
  • Let your vagina breathe! Don’t wear a thong every day all day. Sleep naked when you can.
  • Don’t hang out in your sportswear after your workout.

Yeast infections are never pleasant, but the good news is that recovery requires only the dose of fluconazole , and a few days. (Pro tip: Don’t worry about the suppositories you find at the pharmacy. These things are difficult to deal with!)

Urethral infection

The location of the urethra – right at the center of the entire process – makes urination immediately after sex an absolute must. The bacteria enter the urethra when you descend, which can lead to a urinary tract infection if you don’t urinate immediately afterward. UTI is excruciatingly painful; it seems as if thousands of tiny shards of glass enter your urethra every time you urinate. Trust me, you want to avoid UTIs like the plague. You can also take cranberry extract as a precautionary measure.

Vaginal tears

The walls of the vagina are delicate and prone to tiny microcracks. Most of these lesions heal quickly and on their own, but it is worth taking a break from penetration when you feel pain. Using artificial lubricant is a great way to prevent tearing.


If your sex life includes any vigorous pushing, at one point or another you will definitely have a queef (aka “vaginal farting”). Queef occurs when air enters the vagina and exits. Queefs can be embarrassing at the moment, but they are a natural byproduct of penetration. Just laugh at it or ignore it!

While we are talking about air in your vagina, never, NEVER allow anyone to forcefully blow air into your vagina. In rare cases, it can cause an air embolism, which can be fatal.


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