How to Keep Having Sex When You’re Not Feeling Very Sexy

Even when you are not feeling the hottest, you are still drawn to a partner in a good relationship. It may sound incredible, but it is true. It doesn’t matter if you feel uncomfortable with your appearance, are going through a sad period or have health problems – there are many reasons why you may not feel sexy, and your unique reasons may make you not want to show this part. yourself to someone else. However, you can overcome this. Here’s how to deal with and deal with your feelings of non-sexuality.

Remember you are not alone

You are far from the only person who has ever had problems in the bedroom, whether it be due to the fact that you are unhappy with yourself or physically unable to work.

“Men and women who seek help for low libido often wonder why the things that dominated their young life have diminished or disappeared altogether,” said Jim Staheli DO, medical director at Hone Health . He noted that some studies have shown that up to 33% of people experience some form of sexual dysfunction.

See? You’re not alone.

He also pointed out that “causation varies,” but there are many ways to deal with these kinds of problems, including lifestyle changes, hormone replacement therapy, talk therapy, medications, and more.

There wouldn’t be such a wide variety of resources and options available if this problem wasn’t widespread, would it? Take it easy knowing that many people have gone through this and that you too can overcome it.

Tell yourself if it has to do with insecurity

Maybe your problem is not so much in the physical plane as in insecurity, which is completely normal. With the best of us, you have to belittle your appearance or your sleeping ability, but you have to remember that your partner never judges you as harshly as you judge yourself.

If you’re gaining weight, having a breakout, or going through a dry spell, you may be worried about how you look to them, but they almost certainly do n’t care about how you look or perform. They are probably just happy to be close to someone – perhaps especially you – and you should take that approach too.

Typically, people do n’t really care about physical things – at least not about connection and the more emotional elements of connection or partnership. A new study by Medzino, which involved more than 1,000 people, found that 71% of women rate personality as the best quality for attracting a sexual partner, and 49% point to humor. Only 46% indicate sexual activity, and even less – only 34%! – list views. According to the women surveyed, having sex depends not so much on stamina and experience as on confidence. But foreplay is even more important than all of this.

Men also noted that personality is the most important quality in attracting a sexual partner, followed by confidence. Again, physical appearance and sexual performance were much lower on the list.

According to another study by Match.com, interest in physical attractiveness has even declined every year. An annual study by Singles in America, which surveyed over 5,000 single people in the United States, found that emotional maturity far outstrips physical attraction as the quality partner people want. Yes, 78% of singles said physical attraction is an important quality of a partner, but in reality this is less than 90% last year.

It is not for us to explain why this is so. It may be that during the pandemic isolation, people became introspective – or less picky. Who knows? However, our job is to share statistics with you and the numbers look good.

How to talk to a partner

You should feel comfortable talking to your partner about anything, but this is easier said than done. After all, you are uncomfortable physically engaging in intimacy with them, so it’s not hard to imagine that you would feel odd about engaging in intimate conversation with them. However, you really should.

If you are feeling depressed and it affects your sex life, you deserve to work with them for yourself, but they also deserve to know what is happening to you. If you constantly try to interrupt the termination session, you may hurt their feelings or confuse them. Having an open, honest conversation about how you feel can help you both come to some conclusions and find solutions. It won’t hurt you to hear directly from them that they still find you attractive and want to be with you. If there are problems, you can work together on fun ways to solve them.

Don’t wait to talk about it. Bring it in calmly, maybe at dinner or while you chill out. Be clear about your feelings, tell them that your avoidance of sex is not their fault, and accept whatever they tell you about their feelings without defensiveness.

Finally, avoid the urge to apply dressing solutions. Do not shake the light or delay intimacy. Don’t keep it to yourself and stay miserable. Eliminate the root cause so you can enjoy your bedroom fun again as you should.