How to Refuse Communication
States are reopening despite numerous warnings from experts that it is still unsafe. Meanwhile, we all suffer from salon fever – which is understandable – which means that in the coming weeks and months, you may have to weigh your personal safety and the desires of other people who want to communicate with you and your family.
Maybe it’s a friend who wants to meet at a restaurant, or family members who want to arrange a meeting, or grandparents who really, really want to see their grandchildren.
When it comes to this type of request, it’s important to be aware of the risks – including knowing what the local situation is in terms of guidelines and the number of cases – but it’s also very important to trust your intuition and be able to say no if an offer seems unsafe to you.
While saying no is awkward, especially when you’re delivering bad news to loving people, doing it is a valuable skill indeed – and not only during a pandemic. If you find yourself in a situation where you have to say a difficult but necessary “no” to friends or family, here are some strategies you can use.
Give a quick answer
It can be really hard to say no, especially if you say no to someone you care about, and especially if you don’t want to say no but feel you need it because you are uncomfortable with the risks you take but which others can. do not know. For this reason, you may be putting off answering a question, whether it’s answering a birthday party, agreeing to that friend’s dinner party, or going to meet your family. No one wants to miss an important event, but at a time like this you may have to do it to stay (or feel) safe.
Instead of postponing the discussion until a later date, it’s best to respond quickly so that you don’t waste hours and hours worrying about the reaction you will get.
Briefly explain why
Strictly speaking, you don’t have to tell anyone why you’re uncomfortable doing something, but if you say no to someone you care about, it’s helpful to give a short reason. “I’m not comfortable doing this,” “I’m worried that there are still too many cases,” “I’m worried because I’m at high risk,” or “I’m worried because I live at high risk. people ”are all good reasons and should be respected by your friends and family.
Suggest an alternative
Chances are, your friends and family are suggesting these encounters because the past few months have been tough and they miss you. Isolation is no joke, especially for people living alone or experiencing emotional difficulties. We all miss being in the same room with people close to us. It’s okay to want to hug people again.
If so, suggesting an alternative is a good idea. For example, you might meet in a park, each bringing their own food and chairs, for a physical remote meeting . Or, you can share food at a physical distance : each of you can prepare a meal, leave it safely in each other’s homes, and eat together at Zoom. You can find another creative way to celebrate a birthday or celebrate a family reunion.
While it may not be the same as meeting in person, it is still a way to show that you care and that you want to stay connected, even during the most difficult times.
No means no
You have to make it clear that no means no . If pressure is still exerted on you even after talking about the reasons for not participating in the meeting, you can simply say “no” again and end the conversation there. Ideally, your friends and family will respect your decision, even if they disagree with you. If things get tense, it might be a good idea to revisit the conversation later , when everyone is less emotional, to talk about what the boundaries and boundaries should look like in this relationship.
Ultimately, over the coming months, you will need to trust your instincts and learn to say no if something you are asked to do seems unsafe. Hopefully with a little practice and the right approach, this will get easier over time.