This Breakfast Sandwich Is Really Bad

I live on the west coast, which means that by the time I get up and flicker, most of my colleagues are already several hours ahead of me, and there are often multiple messages waiting for me. Yesterday morning, one of them was a link to this article in the Daily Mail that our deputy editor Jordan Calhoun sent me.

The article boasted “a secret bacon and egg roll trick” that will “change the way you eat them forever.” Cunning? Dig a hole in the crispy roll, place some bacon, crack an egg on top of the bacon, sprinkle the bacon with cheese, then cover and bake everything together. The Daily Mail said this configuration would “prevent the liquid yolk from oozing out of the bread.”

“Is this really good?” Jordan asked. “I saw it work,” I replied as soon as I woke up, “although if you cut it [the sandwich] in half, [the yolk] will still ooze, lol.” But then I drank coffee, thought a little more and read the article. Then doubt arose.

For starters, I’m pretty sure the only way to prevent the yolk from oozing out is to boil it until it’s no longer runny – it’s a matter of physics! – but Mail seemed convinced that it was the best solution. “This simple trick will prevent the yolk from oozing all over the roll or leaking down the arms while eating,” they explained. “Instead, the bread will absorb all the yolk.”

This was not my experience.

I built a sandwich as said. I cut a very thin slice of bread at the top of the bun, dug a small hole at the bottom, and laid the salted pork on top of it. (I used prosciutto because it was what I had and because it felt like it did a better job of keeping the raw protein from seeping into the bread.) Then I smashed the egg into the meat nest, sprinkled it with cheese, closed it, and baked for 25 minutes at 355 ℉. (The Mail article suggests a cooking temperature of 190 ℃, but the video says 180 ℃ should be used; I went with the video.)

It looked very nice and I would be quite happy to eat it with a fork and knife (with hot sauce) like I would an egg in a hole (because that’s basically what it is – a baked egg – in a hole). I usually cut my breakfast sandwiches in half, but that would negate the whole point of experimenting with the yolk, so I left the sandwich in its entirety and took a careful bite.

It was really hot. I took another (very hot) bite, then another. It took me about five bites to get to the yolk (also kind of hot) that splattered from the sandwich all over my face, which I didn’t like. I don’t have a photo for you because I don’t want to post a photo of me with literally an egg on my face on the Internet. The bread didn’t really have a chance to soak up the yolk because the yolk flew out and also because both slices of bread were covered in prosciutto or cheese, two fatty ingredients that retain moisture (and runny yolk).

Aside from the mess, the ratio of yolk to other sandwich ingredients was not the best. My first five bites were without yolk and I didn’t like that. The whole point of runny yolk is that it oozes out when you cut the sandwich, allowing you to dip the sandwich into it while you eat and enjoy the yolk in every bite.

I decided to make another one to see if I like it, it is better to cut it in half. I think it was good, but as messy as any other egg sandwich, if not dirtier. Half of the yolk popped out of one side of the sandwich, probably due to the fact that it was covered in greasy, slippery meat and cheese.

Again, I could see that it works quite elegantly like a fork and knife, but this is not an improvement on the usual configuration of a breakfast sandwich. My advice is to accept the messy nature of the yolk. Or, if you don’t want a messy sandwich, try scrambled eggs. Scrambled eggs do not ooze.

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