Use the Date Me Document to Help You Find a Serious Relationship
Tired of flipping through dating apps? Well, if you’re anything like me and have a penchant for long reads and Canva, then you might want to try a different approach when it comes to attracting love: the Date Me document.
Think of dates as a summary of your love life. You share a Google Doc, or if you prefer, perhaps a creatively inspired PDF with a potential match, describing what you’re looking for, who you are, and anything else you think is important when it comes to searching. the right person for you. The idea is that this dating document is longer and more detailed than what you would normally write for a dating profile.
I know what you’re thinking: Dating already seems like a second job to you most of the time, so why would you waste time creating something that you think should belong to LinkedIn? Listen: if you’re serious about being compatible with someone who’s just as serious about being compatible, then a dating document is the best way to do it.
“The person who takes the time to create a dating document and tells you the details of their life is more likely to take dating seriously,” says Gabriela (Gaby) Reyes , LMFT and resident dating expert Chispa . “You also have the option to skip small talk and learn the basics right away, which can cut down on the number of people you talk to. It’s less tiring than contacting 20 potential dates when you’re on a dating app and then weeding them out one by one based on the same old small talk.”
Below is a case where you are trying to find love, or at least a relationship that lasts longer than a swipe.
It shows that you are serious about finding a relationship.
You knowingly wrote from 800 to 1000 (sometimes even 2000!) words. If you spend enough time putting together the best relationship resume for yourself, detailing who you are, what you’re looking for in a relationship, and what the other person can expect from you in a relationship, then you know it’s serious. The same goes for the person reading your document. These are not quick biographies of 150 characters or less. Dating papers are a serious investment of time, which means that the likelihood of finding someone who will invest in getting to know you and spend time with you is pretty high.
You can be as picky as you want
“As a therapist, I hear many of my patients tell me that they consider themselves to be ‘too picky,'” says Reyes. “Usually I disagree. If you’re looking for something serious, someone you can potentially spend your whole life with, you have to be picky. All this energy, time and effort should be spent on someone who will give you what you need and what you want.
The Date Me document allows you to be as selective as your heart desires, allowing you to say whatever you definitely want and definitely don’t want in a partner. Some TikTok users require to know your employment status and copies of your government ID in their date papers. Others have used subcategories to define the exact qualities they are looking for. There is no limit to what you want to ask on your date me document, giving you more options to find someone who matches your criteria.
You can skip small talk
Enough with the “I love travel and tacos” that are all too common on typical dating profiles – let’s get down to the nitty-gritty. Date-me’s paperwork is filled with personal details, including everything from anecdotes to a list of any felonies and testimonials from past partners, which suffice to say, really helps people get to know each other on a more intimate basis. This is an honest approach that ensures transparency from the very beginning, so that you have a better understanding of who this person is even before your first date. You can move on to a much more interesting conversation than just talking about tacos when you meet.
You can create a new way to get to know someone
Dating apps can be boring and tedious, especially if they are still used for dating. By creating a dating document and publishing it, you open yourself up to connect with people from all over the world. You can post the link on your social media pages, or even send the link to friends who can send it to people they think might be a good fit. It’s vulnerable, yes, but isn’t that the whole point of dating?
“I love any trend that encourages more when it comes to dating,” says Reyes. “More communication, more information, more connection, etc. [Date-me docs] encourage people to learn more about each other before diving into something. It can help people build deeper connections. Making dating easier is great as long as we don’t compromise a real and deep connection. I think dating papers are a step in the right direction.”