The Smartest Ways to De-Escalate Conflict at Work
Conflicts between colleagues are normal: when several people work on something, disagreements inevitably arise. In some cases, conflicts in the workplace can be helpful as they give colleagues a chance to discuss issues that have arisen and may even lead to a solution that is best for everyone.
But it is not always the case. Sometimes these differences can escalate, especially when it comes to office politics. If you are facing colleagues in the midst of a tense or even hostile situation, or are involved in one yourself, here are some de-escalation techniques that you might find helpful.
How to de-escalate conflicts at work
Try one (or all) of these strategies the next time you’re involved in a workplace conflict:
Pay attention to body language
If you feel like you need to be defensive, you may unconsciously adopt a more aggressive posture and body language than usual, but try your best to avoid it. Maintain a neutral facial expression and keep your hands in front of you in an open, relaxed position. Avoid crossing your arms, shrugging your shoulders, and (literally) pointing your finger.
Understand Your Conflict Style
According to Amy Gallo, an expert in workplace communications, most people approach conflict as either “avoidant” (avoid it at all costs) or “seeker” (value raw honesty and strong debate).
To de-escalate conflict at work, you need to know what type you are and then do your best to go against your instincts. For avoiders, she says, it means speaking openly, even if it’s difficult. For seekers, this means taking a step back and focusing on listening rather than talking.
Listen then answer
When someone says something we don’t agree with, especially if it directly affects us, it’s tempting to jump in and defend ourselves by responding to their every statement or accusation. But this is unlikely to improve anything and will most likely piss off the person you are interrupting. Instead, let them finish what they have to say and then respond accordingly.