Psychological Tricks That Really Work
Despite our illusions of independence and control, it is possible to manipulate people through various psychological tricks – hell, the entire advertising and marketing industry is built on this. So it goes without saying that a little light mind control can make things run their course a little more often. However, when you delve into supposed psychological tricks, you often get bogged down in a plethora of pseudoscientific and dubious claims. But while it’s true that you’re not going to control minds and hypnotize people into doing your bidding anytime soon, there are psychological tricks that do work and are supported by scientific evidence.
If you want to get a head start in your daily life, here are some mind tricks that really work.
Create debt
If you want to get someone to do something for you and meet resistance, one trick you can use is to create debt by doing something for them first. It depends on what is known as the norm of reciprocity – basically the pressure people feel to return the favor. A simple example: someone washes your windshield while you’re at a traffic light and then asks for a tip. You didn’t ask them to clean your windshield, but once it’s done, you feel the need to reciprocate.
You can create this debt in a variety of ways. Waiters in restaurants take personal notes on your bill to create a debt of goodwill by encouraging bigger tips. Companies offer free trials of products and services because they know that by using the product, you will feel indebted and will be more reluctant to cancel or return an item. So the next time you need someone to do something for you and you feel like they don’t want to, do something for them and you’ll increase your chances of success.
Mirror reflection
Yes, something Andy Bernard used inThe Office is a legitimate psychological trick backed by science. Personality reflection, or the chameleon effect , is when we unconsciously mimic the people around us—their postures, looks, and other behaviors. We all have a tendency to do this because of what is known as the “perception-behavior connection” where observing a behavior increases the likelihood that we will repeat it.
You can use this to your advantage by deliberately copying the people you are trying to influence by matching their mannerisms and other behaviors. This will increase credibility and make you more authoritative and trustworthy because you will literally remind people of yourself.
ask again
Are you trying to get someone to do something? Try the Door to Face (DITF) technique . You use this trick by first asking your target for something far more complex or more outrageous than what you really want – something they will surely refuse. Then step back and ask them about your original desire. The chances of them agreeing are now much higher due to DITF, which is based on the norm of reciprocity discussed above (the name of this technique is taken from the concept of people slamming the door in the face of a pushy salesperson). When you downgrade what you are asking for, it is perceived subconsciously as a concession, which creates debt. People will have a strong desire to cancel this debt by agreeing to your “lesser” request.
repeat yourself
If you are trying to convince someone of something, one of the most powerful psychological tricks you can use is the so-called biased repetition . In fact, the perceived legitimacy and truth of any statement is the higher the more often it is repeated – in other words, the more you repeat even outright false or incorrect information, the more likely people will start to believe you. This leads to the so-called ” illusory truth effect “, and the last few years have shown how powerful it can be even when working with a huge population with access to factual information. So the next time you need to convince someone of something, just keep repeating it persistently – you’ll tire them out eventually.
imply scarcity
The Scarcity Principle is one of the most common examples of the blatant psychological deception we face on a daily basis. Whenever you see an ad that promises something that is limited in time or quantity, it uses the scarcity effect against you. It’s easy to see why this works: we tend to give more importance to something when we think it’s rare. When you are told that an opportunity exists only for a short time or in limited quantities, your fear of missing out (FOMO) hits hard and you almost instinctively want to avoid it.
While this is most useful for marketing products, you can also use this trick in other ways. You can trick people into spending time with you, for example, by implying that you can’t fit them into your busy schedule.
Speak confidently
Thoughtful choice of vocabulary during a conversation can have a huge impact on how you are perceived and how often people do what you want. We often unconsciously “insure” when we speak using phrases such as “I think” or “I’m not 100% sure, but…”. This gives your audience the opportunity to question what you are saying and perceive you as less reliable.
On the other hand, using confident phrases like “I know” or “I believe” will make your argument more authoritative, even if nothing changes in what you say. In other words, your claims may be just as dubious as ever, but because you make them with such confidence, people will be more likely to believe you.
Use Names
If you feel like someone’s attention is being pulled away from you, or if you want to make sure they’re focused on you no matter what’s going on around you, try using their name. Science tells us that hearing our name creates the ” cocktail party effect” , which describes how we instinctively filter out all other stimuli when we hear something interesting, and our own names cause this effect to spike.
That’s why salespeople are usually taught to repeat your name frequently when they’re giving you their presentation, and you can use this simple technique to make sure people pay attention and feel involved when you’re talking. Your audience may not even understand why they remember their conversation with you so well, or why they didn’t notice the other people in the room while you were talking.
be present
If you’re trying to build trust with someone, you can use something called “intimacy” to get people to trust you. Affinity is the feeling of familiarity that people get when they are used to seeing you all the time: the more you are “present” in their lives, the more likely they are to feel close to you and trust you.
For example, an experiment was conducted in which four women pretended to be students in a classroom. The women didn’t interact with any of the other students at all—they just showed up. The impostors attended varying numbers of classes, and at the end of the semester, other students were shown pictures and asked for their opinion. The women who attended the most classes — who were the most “present” — elicited higher levels of intimacy, even if they didn’t talk to anyone.
Give compliments
One of the most cunning tricks involves the so-called spontaneous trait transfer . In a nutshell, this means that people tend to refer to you with the adjectives you use to refer to other people .
So, if you want someone to think you’re smart, start calling other people smart. If you want to be seen as confident or even attractive, describe others using these terms. Over time, everyone will begin to look at you through the prism of these comments. Keep in mind that this also works the other way around: if you irritably insult other people all day long, people around you may begin to treat you very negatively.
Touch
Do you want to influence people? Try subconscious touch. Subconscious touch is just an occasional interpersonal contact while interacting with someone. A brief touch on their arm or shoulder has been shown to make people instantly feel warmer towards you. While you often hear this advice in the context of dating and romantic relationships, it’s a powerful mind trick whenever you’re trying to look positive. For example, a study by the University of Mississippi and Rhodes College found that restaurant waitresses who touched their customers lightly received significantly larger tips.
There is no real mind control, but you can use these real, real mind tricks to get some benefits. Just remember that other people are likely to use the same tricks against you .