I Am a Family Therapy Psychologist Dr. Orna Guralnik and This Is How I Work.
Dr. Orna Guralnik’s career is all about setting boundaries. As a psychoanalyst, the boundaries between her and her patients, in addition to the necessary space between her work and personal life, are in constant interaction. Combine that with a Showtime couples therapy session that at least one big- name store has called ” raw and delicious ,” and you have a pretty professional balance.
Dr. Guralnik’s work does not stop when the cameras are turned off; she still meets clients and does research when producers and directors are not around, and looks for ways to communicate her methods, expanding her horizons through fiction reading, meditation and yoga practice. I asked Dr. Guralnik about the constant switch between professional and private, and about the very public forum of her Showtime series, which will premiere its second season on April 18th.
How is relationship counseling different from talking therapy with just one client?
I was attracted to working with couples because intimate love relationships (or refusing to enter into one) is such an important drive and experience for most people. People express much of who they are in their married couples – starting with their early history of attachment to their politics and how they think they should handle disagreements and resolve conflicts. In solo work, much of the work is reflective and contemplative, while couples quickly act out their problems in real time rather than thinking and discussing them. Pairing is a good balance for my deep psychoanalytic work with individuals.
How do you deal with the consulting requirements for TV shows in addition to more traditional clients?
While the work itself isn’t much different, my work on the documentary series is also a lot of team work as I work closely with a brilliant and talented group of directors and editors. It is a wonderful addition to my life as an analyst, which is usually much more secluded. When it comes to balancing a lot of requirements, I try to maintain firm boundaries between the different areas of my life. Preparing for different modes of work is similar in terms of taking care of my mind. I read a lot of theory and discuss my work with colleagues to make sure I have a meaningful life outside of work. In addition, I create a space to support my mind by reading fiction, meditating and doing yoga.
What wouldn’t someone watching your show see in terms of your average workday?
Being a psychoanalyst means always working to deepen and expand the mind. I belong to reading and writing groups that have been around for decades, and I write academically and take courses – just like my colleagues. And I definitely read poetry. It’s all about making room for the unconscious to manifest itself.
How do you separate yourself from work?
Boundaries are the key to correct psychoanalytic practice — good boundaries between analyst and patient so that you don’t flood the patient with your own “things” and vice versa, and boundaries between the space of therapeutic work and the rest of life. At this point, most of the time, I can decide how much material I want to keep processing in sessions, and when it’s a good idea to let go and return to it when I have room.
When it comes to developing new conflict resolution tools, how much hands-on work with couples compared to you when you are thinking?
Difficult to separate. Many spontaneous new ideas come up in sessions, but they are actually the result of a lot of behind-the-scenes work that takes place while thinking, reading, and talking with colleagues.