You Can Control Yourself Better
Sometimes we make colossally bad decisions that ruin our lives for a while. We stay in the wrong job or in toxic relationships for too long. We associate with the wrong people or make risky investments that don’t pay off. There are times when our mistakes and failures can be attributed to a particular decision or event that took us off course.
And there are times when our personal and professional inertia is driven by small, almost imperceptible ways in which we behave on a daily basis – unconscious micro-decisions that, taken individually, do not matter much, but grow stronger over time, have a big impact on our lives. . life: Namely, our habits – and the ability to manage them: I’m talking about self-control (or lack of it).
While we often conclude that lack of self-control in the form of inattention, procrastination, or laziness is inherent in who we are, we actually have more free will and control over our impulses than we think. According to Stanford neuroscientist Andrew Huberman , we are not just victims of our habits, but impulse control is a skill that can be trained.
Become aware of your “going” and “non-going” functions
In an interview with The Knowledge Project, Huberman explains the influence of a part of the brain called the basal ganglia in our daily lives. Responsible for integrating thought and action, dopamine-regulated ganglia either push us toward action-oriented “movement functions” such as eating breakfast and making our bed, or “inhibition functions” that inhibit behavior.
While we learn a lot of “forbidden” behavior as children, such as sitting still and not interrupting others, as we get older, our life is focused on walking, walking, walking. E-mail, calls, instant messaging, alternating between 17 open windows in our computer’s dock, and generally multitasking like our lives depended on it.
Huberman says there is less opportunity for adults to practice interrupting this “forward” function. “We seldom rehearse our inhibiting features… which simply suppress the behavior.” But suppressing unproductive behaviors is essential if we are to stick to our plans, complete complex tasks on time, and achieve long-term goals.
How to pump up the “impassable” muscle
In his own life, in an attempt to reinforce the circuitry that controls his impulses when he is about to move into reflexive action, Huberman attempts to create 20 to 30 “forbidden moments” throughout the day. “What you need to understand about neural circuits is that they are universal,” he says. For example, if you establish a taboo pattern around not biting your nails, this extends to other areas in which you would like to establish more self-control.
Huberman gave several examples of how to create prohibitions (which can be trivial) in everyday life.
Don’t Grab Your Phone : How many times a day do you reach for your phone? (Don’t answer, I don’t want to feel worse about my addiction.) The next time you get bored, stumped or procrastinated and feel the urge to mindlessly scroll through social media or check the news, resist. At least for a while.
Stick to a routine (i.e., stick to your plan) : If you have a plan, like exercising at the gym or running errands, stick to it according to the plan, rather than doing something more spontaneous and casual. switching on the fly.
90-minute work blocks : Work 90 minutes at a time, resisting the urge to get up and grab a coffee, snack, fold laundry, or anything else besides the current task. Create a tunnel vision focus and, unless there is an urgent need to interrupt your work, keep your ass still.
Controlled snack breaks : Postpone getting the snack you want when the impulse or food cravings kick in. (Huberman notes that this is not the best option for people recovering from an eating disorder.)
Meditation . Forcing yourself to do any mindfulness practice when you prefer to get up is a way to train a tight muscle.
Huberman warned against neurotic attachment to these inhibitions, but rather used them as a practice, like lifting weights for our brain. Since we adults are not supervised, we ourselves must train the neural circuits that interrupt unproductive behaviors, such as spending hours of the day scrolling or jumping between projects without completing any.
“We need to constantly train these taboo schemes. Currently, there are so many opportunities and rewards for “going” that we do not train non-going paths.” In an era of smartphones and instant access to information, Huberman adds, “pretty soon you have hours of the day that weren’t structured.”