Why You Shouldn’t Contact Companies That Speak “Yogababble”
Some companies try to differentiate themselves by positioning themselves as more than just a business. Instead, such companies purportedly pursue higher goals. The only thing is that these identities are usually supported by a lot of rhetorical bullshit.
Look for nothing but WeWork, the corporate unicorn that gained worldwide acclaim only to collapse when its IPO flopped, in part because its S-1 documents were riddled with “gossip.”
In truth, there are plenty of companies out there that adhere to the same rules that WeWork did before its spectacular decline, and when you apply for a job, you have to watch out for pointless corporate bullshit, if only to avoid working for a company that might mask wider inefficiencies behind intrusive rhetoric.
What is Yogubble?
Even if you haven’t come across the term, chances are you are familiar with yogababble, which is interchangeable with core words that accurately define empty corporate vocabulary (see: jargon, buzzwords, etc.).
Yogubble, however, bears witness to a new kind that is typically used by tech-savvy firms that spread ideas about causing widespread social change through what they sell, sometimes conveyed through moods associated with spirituality. The phrase was coined in 2019 by NYU marketing professor Scott Galloway in connection with WeWork’s doomed IPO prospectus that same year.
Usually, this kind of trap is not even subtle, as it is present in all company statements and “About” sections on countless corporate websites. The point is, there is a direct correlation between the degree to which a company is doing yoga and the appalling financial return, especially when it comes to shareholders.
Galloway explained how it works in a 2019 video:
Of course, this is not something unique to billion-dollar companies, although it is firmly entrenched among large corporate leaders. Smaller companies have also taken advantage of the seeming need for yogic chatter.
How to recognize a yogic rag before applying for a job
As you browse through the list of vacancies and read about the company, ask yourself a simple question: Do you understand what the company does and what its values are after reading the corporate mission statement or the “About” section?
If a company claims to “leverage existing synergies between corporate stakeholders and emerging technologies to bring about social change and drive innovation,” chances are they are selling you a lot of trivia. It doesn’t have to be pure yogic chatter – traditional corporate jargon is also widespread, and it doesn’t need to dabble in spiritual topics to go crazy with confusing clichés.
Bottom line: If you are more confused about the goals of the company after reading about its higher calling, do not apply, as you may end up in a house of cards.
Why you shouldn’t contact companies using yogable
Such rhetoric often serves as a bandage for solving serious problems that a company may face. Rather than finding a higher calling while working there, it is more likely that a company that builds its reputation on some obscure mantra will have deep-seated problems that will negatively impact your length of work and your work experience.
WeWork was known for making its employees work overtime for low pay. Uber faced internal and social condemnation for its attitudes towards female employees and the behavior of its former CEO Travis Kalanick in 2017 (the company’s current motto is “We open opportunities by setting the world in motion,” whatever that means). You can probably name more examples. This culture is so widespread that it has become part of a broader corporate culture: each person’s LinkedIn profiles boast self-named titles such as Chief Ninja Accountant or Change Alchemist.
It is more than possible that whichever commonplace jargon the company uses is simply disguising its reckless – or perhaps even reckless – leadership. So basically, if a company covers itself with a blanket of chatter or spews corporate platitudes to lure you in, that’s another reason to stay away.