Spend More Time With Your Fans Than With Your Haters to Avoid Negative Bias
No matter what you do in life, you will attract a lot of people who just hate what you do. It’s unavoidable. While you may have to listen to criticism , it may be better to disproportionately balance your time with fans and haters.
As the 99u productivity blog points out, we can take negative comments much more personally than compliments. Compliments seem fleeting, we may suspect ulterior motives or imagine that the person giving the compliment does n’t really know why we suck. On the other hand, one negative comment can ruin our day. Given the natural tendency many of us have to accept negative comments over positive ones, it makes sense to spend more time with our fans to counterbalance this:
McCabe recommends compensating for any negativity 5 times (10 hours of negativity = 50 hours of positive mood). This may sound like a lot, but remember how much even one negative comment can carry. When dealing with negative people, go on the offensive. Understand that even if they don’t say something discouraging, their negative thinking may reflect on you. Don’t look for confirmation or inspiration. Be an inspiration. Ask what they enjoy doing, when was the last time they did it, and how they can find more time to do it. Then find a support network that can inspire you.
Of course, this does not mean that you should think that your fans are always right. There is a time for constructive criticism, and your haters may have as many good arguments as your fans. However, when it comes to your confidence , spending more time with your fans can give you the emotional courage you need to keep working.
For every 10 hours of haters, spend 50 with your cheerleaders | 99u