Improve Self-Control With a 10-Minute Delay
When it’s too hard to deny yourself a cigarette, eat that donut, or splurge on a new coat, tell yourself instead to wait just 10 minutes before giving up. This “mini-delay” in gratification will help you develop self-control over time.
I’ve read a lot of self-help tips for increasing your self-control , but this one from Kelly McGonigal’s Willpower Instinct can be especially powerful and immediately put into practice. She calls this the 10-minute delay rule. Anytime you feel the urge to do something that you know is counterproductive for your goals (but you just can’t do anything about it!), Postpone gratification for just 10 minutes.
For 10 minutes, which may be the longest in your life, you may distance yourself from the object of desire or be distracted by chatting with someone. Knowing that you only have to wait 10 minutes and not just say no to yourself also reduces the anxiety you deal with. If after 10 minutes you find that the urge is still there, go for it.
Ten minutes doesn’t seem like a lot of time, but with more practice, 10 minutes can turn into 20, 30 or 60 minutes, and soon you can put off gratification as long as you want. With this strategy, McGonigal says, the brain sees it as a “future reward” and removes the overwhelming need for immediate gratification.
So, by simply saying to yourself “wait 10 minutes,” you are gradually training your brain to delay gratification and help you achieve your goals that are truly important to you.
Willpower Instinct | Kelly McGonigal