All the Kid’s Equipment Tips That Don’t Matter
Once I was in your shoes, new parents. Buying the perfect diaper bag, reducing baby equipment lists to the essentials. Three children later, I’m here to tell you: you think too much about it. Most of your shopping decisions don’t really matter.
Diaper bag doesn’t matter
While the child is not yet there, you can convince yourself that you can come up with a plan that is perfect for you as a parent.
Let’s start with the diaper bag because it is a microcosm of everything related to baby equipment. You want to take everything you need with you , but not too much . Maybe you think that means being a Super Mom or a Super Dad who lugs around smart things like the Tide Fecal Stain Pen . Or maybe you aspire to be a minimalist who has a handcrafted roll-up changing pad with only the essentials hidden inside.
At first I thought I would be a minimalist. But when my son was only a few days old, I was afraid to leave anything at home. What if he needs a change of clothes? What if he needs toys? What if he needs a blanket? What if he rubs it all over and needs another blanket? I removed the tags from the giant diaper bag my mother gave me, the one that seemed too big at first. This will do.
The giant bag strategy worked for weeks, but the bag was so huge that I eventually stopped pulling it out of the car. Why would I carry an 8kg baby and a 10lb diaper bag? So I started to carry around the minimalist changing table that I had chosen before he was born. However, I always used two diapers that I put inside and forgot to replace them. I carried an empty changing table with me. What was the point in that again?
There are really only two ways to pack a diaper bag. You may be carrying too much or you may be carrying too little . There is no perfect middle ground.
By baby # 2, I knew not to pack a diaper bag. I would take one or two diapers and a pack of tissues and put them in my purse when I left the house.
For baby # 3, I sometimes forgot diapers.
I prefer this now. I keep a diaper box in the trunk of my car. Like, I just buy them and never bring the box into the house. Thus, I will never be left without a diaper. Note: Unless you live in a car-focused suburb, you may need to carry diapers with you. Tuck a handful into your purse or bag you’re already carrying.
I also try to memorize napkins, but you can wipe your baby’s bottom with toilet paper. Just like you wipe your ass with toilet paper. It’s nice to have a change of clothes for your baby, but it’s not necessary because babies are cute when they are naked.
The brand of children’s equipment doesn’t matter
The Children’s Manufacturing Complex wants you to believe that their products are needed and that there are significant differences between them. In many cases, this is simply not true. Cribs are great, but babies can sleep peacefully in cardboard boxes . Baby cereal is not a necessary food; it is just one of many nutritional options .
For some items on which a child’s safety depends, the rules mean that all products on the market are safe. For example, car seats must meet federal safety standards . The more expensive ones are not necessarily safer, they are just prettier or more convenient .
Likewise, all infant formula should provide the child with the necessary nutrients . One brand may be more convenient or cheaper than another, but there are no significant differences . If your doctor prescribes something for a specific reason, such as an allergy, follow her instructions. Otherwise, it doesn’t matter.
However, there are only two good highchair options.
I can think of one place that does have the right selection of baby equipment, but you don’t know it by looking at baby equipment magazines and websites. These are high chairs. You can read review after review of the best highchairs , which typically range from $ 150 to $ 300. Or you can find something at Babies R Us for about $ 80. Sure, all of them can hold a baby while you feed him, but would you like to scoop dried sweet potato puree out of the slots in the built-in upholstery? If not (tip: you won’t), you have two options. Conveniently, they are affordable:
- ANTILOPE from IKEA , which costs $ 20. You can get the baby out and dry the chair faster than the time it takes to fiddle with the disassembly switches on any of these feeding chairs.
- Keep your baby on your lap . If anything, that’s what they prefer.
I suppose I’m denting my own advice a bit by saying that there are choices which are best, but parenting is full of surprises and controversy. Get used to it. Does it matter if you buy a wipe high chair or one of the fussy ones around? Not too much. If you never knew that ANTILOPE existed, you would buy this chair for $ 80 and put up with it. But now you know, and I hope I let you know while you still have your receipt.
Prepare to be amazed
Each parent has a different style and each child has different preferences. This makes any childish advice, including mine, obsolete, at least for a while. You can get addicted to getting blankets while your friend has never used any of them. Your first child may like something that the second will not stand. No amount of training or experience will allow you to get it right.
For example, I laughed at the concept of a napkin warmer . It’s a real device that’s, yes, on your dresser, using electricity 24/7 to heat a stack of napkins, in line with the head of a baby equipment company’s idea of the correct temperature for wiping on the buttocks. When I saw them in the store, I shook my head. After my first child was born, I confidently rolled my eyes at the idea. Babies don’t care what temperature their wipes are. They definitely don’t need a special device.
But then my second child was born, and if you wiped his ass with a cold napkin during a sleepy diaper change in the middle of the night, he screamed . We couldn’t sleep well until we bought a napkin heating pad. The baby thought he needed warmer. Perhaps he was wrong, but it is impossible to argue with a baby.
Therefore, I offer this advice. Trace your gear list intuitively, but remember that no amount of planning will take into account your needs. There will always be at least one “important” on your list that will turn out to be useless; and at least one thing that you laughed at will be significant. The rest doesn’t matter.
Illustration by Sam Woolley.