All the Passive-Aggressive Things You Should Never Do in a Relationship
Nobody likes to be with someone who is always passive-aggressive. If you’re not sure what it looks like, here’s a great and fun demo.
“The key to a good relationship is control …” says the doomed couple in this video from YouTube channel AwakenWithJP . “Control is the thread that holds your relationship together, and we’ve found passive aggression to be the best way to control your partner.” Obviously these two are playing for a laugh, but the lesson they share is correct.
Being passive-aggressive isn’t just frustrating for loved ones, it sends mixed signals about how you really feel. If you want to be a good partner and keep things in order, here’s a rundown of all the passive-aggressive activities you should always avoid:
- Cold shoulder treatment : Not only is this the worst way of letting someone know they did something you didn’t like, but it gradually makes people think they are just wrong about who they are.
- Sarcastic comment : When you want to express gratitude, there is no room for ridicule or false shame. It’s not “Thank you for cleaning the kitchen just once,” it’s “Thank you for cleaning the kitchen.”
- Destroy your partner’s dreams : If your partner is energized by the pursuit of a goal, don’t cut it down, but support it. It’s okay to help them stay grounded so they can handle their expectations well, but don’t create another barrier for yourself that they have to overcome.
- Merciless Compliments : This is always rude, no matter who you are talking to. Just be supportive and give regular compliments.
- Making your partner feel out of place : This is perhaps the worst of all. Saying things like “… if you made more money”, “… if you ever took a vacation for us” and “… if we had a nicer home” is a recipe for disaster. …
This cannot be avoided – persistent passive-aggressive behavior is a form of emotional abuse. Self-awareness is needed to stop this. When you know what to look for, it’s easier for you to catch yourself before saying or doing things like that.