How to Get Someone to Stop Talking in a Child’s Voice
You have problems, I have advice. This tip does not contain powdered sugar – in fact, it does not contain sugar and can even be slightly bitter. Welcome to Tough Love .
This week we have a man who, for some inexplicable reason, cannot stand his friend’s childish “boo-boo-tummy” voice.
Mind you, I am not a therapist or any other healthcare professional, but just a guy who is willing to talk about it the way it is. I just want to give you the tools you need to enrich your damn life. If for any reason you don’t like my advice, feel free to file a formal complaint here . So let’s get on with it.
Hi, Patrick,
An old friend got into the habit of speaking in a child’s voice (we are adults). We don’t see each other too often these days, but when we meet and when we say hello or goodbye, or talk about old times, or how long ago it was, or something else sentimental, they go back to this. a childish voice that gives me goosebumps.
Worst of all, their partner, whom I am a huge fan of, also adopted this habit. I overhear them talking in children’s voices. I joked about children’s voices with mutual friends and this person admitted that they do it, but it really makes me feel uncomfortable and I just want it to stop. I am embarrassed for them and do not want others to hear when this person talks to me like that.
How can I politely make them stop? And because it makes me feel uncomfortable, and because I’m sure a lot of other people think it’s pretty weird too.
Thank you,
Adult voice
Hello adult voice:
Wow. I maybe can understand why someone spoke to their soulmate in a childish voice, if they both liked it, but why they talk to you like that, I have no idea. Ugh. I have a few suggestions for you Adult Voice. Let’s do it owie ouchie all better num nums.
Since this problem is usually more common in parents who have a child who has not outgrown baby talk, I will treat it like children. You can customize these tips to be more mature as you are a big boy who can tie shoes on your own.
- Pay attention when they do this: when they are talking about something that they are uncomfortable with? Do they seem to only do this when their partner is around? If there is a trigger for this, you may be able to avoid it or root it out.
- Ignore it (or at least don’t reward): if they speak to you in a childlike voice, act like you can’t hear them. Seriously. Or, if they ask you to do something or answer a question, wait for them to ask you again in their normal voice. When they do, respond immediately so they know.
- Talk to them about it: the next time they talk to you “with a little scrap”, use your best parental voice and say something like, “Why are you talking to me like that?” They may not realize they do it so often, and they probably don’t even know that it bothers you so much, so contact it directly. It could nip him in the bud right now.
- Don’t worry: when you refer to this, don’t give it too much importance. Only talk about it when they actually use their voice, and calmly explain that you think it’s freakin ‘weird for an adult to talk to you like they have a dirty diaper. If you can joke about it, you can laugh about both. When they use it again – they will, because it is a habit they have developed – they will jokingly say something like: “Use your big child’s voice …” or “I didn’t quite get it, sport …”
If these things don’t fix, and you still can’t stand the huuuu and sovi, cut them out. If you wanted a child in your life, you would have given birth to it .
Alternatively, you can alsotake the approach of Michael Scott in his groundbreaking business book, Somehow I Can Do It , and just answer them in your silly voice. Actually, yes, do it. How is your impression of Elvis?
Quickies
Because I just have neither the time nor the patience for all of you …
The feeling of unwillingness asks :
I was planning to go to a meeting at School 40. There hasn’t been much success or achievement in my life. This is partly due to the circumstances, and I have nothing to be ashamed of, and I have never been dishonest. I really wanted to see what all these people look like, remember, talk and have fun. When classmates book tickets, their names are listed. Only about 15% of the class have signed up, and no doubt there will be more, and many of those 15% were my friends at the time that I would like to see.
But all 15% – I mean all – are extremely successful and accomplished.
I’m starting to think that this party was planned with a certain group of people in mind, for whom I would not be on the guest list. Am I going or not? I expect mature people our age to not be violent, but the oneness of the members makes me suspect that I will not be particularly welcomed and that I expected to see it.
You must go! Just as you would expect your older classmates to mature and be less violent, you should have grown out of the “I don’t belong” mentality. If you want to go to a meeting and see your friends, you should definitely do it! If this was your 10 or even 20 year reunion, I would see that people are still immature, “exceptional” or “elite” or something like that. But it’s been forty fucking years! Fuck the achievements and success of these people or something. You say you’re not ashamed, so don’t be. You have lived your life and you have done it.
However, if you walk in as if you don’t belong, or if you keep thinking that you are “not particularly welcome,” people will feel it. You do belong. This is your high school reunion too. Relax, walk with pride and confidence, and have fun remembering your old friends.
That’s all for this week, but I still have a lot of frank and honest advice. Tell me what is bothering you? Does work upset you? Are you having problems with a friend or colleague? Is your love life going through rough times? Do you just feel lost in life, as if you have no direction? Tell me, maybe I can help. I probably won’t make you feel warm and misty inside, but sometimes you need tough love. Ask a question in the comments below or email me at the address you see at the bottom of the page ( please include “TIP” in the subject line ). Or tweet me with #ToughLove ! Also, DO NOT WRITE TO ME IF YOU DO NOT WANT YOUR INQUIRY HAS BEEN REMOVED . I don’t have time to answer everyone. “Until next time, figure it out yourself.