Japan’s First Lady Is Your New Role Model in Avoiding Awkward Conversations

At some point, you will have an awkward conversation. Parties, networking, dinners with the president where you pretend not to speak English are all minefields, potentially littered with awkward pauses , deplorable jokes, and just plain intrusive small talk . You don’t have to put up with the slings and arrows of bad talk. Some tried and tested methods to help you get rid of it already exist, whether it’s bothering a friend or downloading an app:

Excuse yourself

Party conversations can take any direction, but if you’re chatting with someone new or with someone who isn’t particularly interesting, the minute can feel like a monologue. When you feel like a conversation has been going on long enough, the first step should always be a graceful exit.

You can start with a simple “ Sorry, ” or add some mustard, shake your hand and smile. Walk away confidently, knowing that you have been polite and straightforward, then punch the punch bowl (or the door).

Turn your phone into a friend

The tried and tested method of getting out of a congestion is the classic one: emergency interrupt . A message or a phone call from a friend, discovering that oh no, Jennifer has locked herself out of her, and I have a spare key, and an apologetic goodbye is all you need to get away quickly.

Of course, if you have a second of free time, you can always use the app to get yourself out of this awkward situation. Search the App Store for apps like Chelsea Handler’s Gotta Go! an app that lets you customize pre-defined excuses like phone calls and text messages from your contact list.

Tag the team in your negotiations

When there are more than two people in discussions, getting in and out of discussions becomes easier. Attending an event with a friend or acquaintance? Turn a casual one-on-one conversation with a stranger into a triumvirate by inviting another person.

If you are at a networking event , introduce your current conversation partner to someone you may know. Conversely, you can ask them to introduce you to someone they know. From there, you can easily excuse yourself and slip away while they talk.

Keep moving

A moving object remains in motion. The theory applies to both physics and social situations. Walking around town and stopping for every agitator and street musician will not get you where you are going and will probably just disappoint you.

If you feel like you need a good reason not to stop for every clipboard person, just point to your headphones, watch, cloudy sky fraught with rain, or your conveniently located dog on a leash and hit the road. A quick “No thanks” is the perfect capper.

Don’t lead them

It’s perfectly okay to never mess with someone again, but you can leave the wrong impression by ending up with platitudes about exchanging phone numbers and grabbing a beer to avoid stress. Don’t make commitments that you would rather not fulfill. This will not only show the other person something insincere, but it will also make you look dumb when you end up ignoring their messages.

Fake it until you do it (Out)

Watch. Nobody knows who you are or why you are at the afterparty of an international armwrestling symposium, so if you find yourself getting caught up in discussions about top throw training, you’d rather give it up, just fake a little funk. “The only thing I know how to say in English is“ I don’t speak English ”is my main phrase, but feigning ignorance or some form of hearing loss has always helped me in crowded places like bars or parties … Plus, by the time they know you’re joking, you’ll be gone for a long time.

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