What to Never Say or Do at the Airport
We all love to complain about how terrible air travel is, but things can get worse quickly if you don’t take strict security procedures seriously.
If you are anti-authoritarian, getting to a flight via the airport is a nightmare. TSA isn’t messing around and they have a lot of power to make your life miserable, which is incredibly frustrating. Yes, it’s awful that traveling in a tin can requires taking off your shoes and being exposed to radiation, but it’s a protest to file when you don’t have to get to your gate.
However, there are people who do not understand what they can and cannot do on airplanes and airports without being loaded. Flight attendant and writer Elliot Hester recently tried to explain these rules to the public in a story for the Orlando Sentinel. Here are some things that need to be said, but still need to be said.
Explosion threats
Haha, it would be so ridiculous if you had a bomb at the airport, right? Obviously, anyone who looks at you will know that you will never have a bomb in your bag, so joking about that is totally cool. Hester recounted the recent story of Green Bay Packers wide receiver Trevor Davis, who, rather frivolously, responded to an LAX employee who asked a routine question about whether he was packing “aerosols, knives, or explosives.”
“Yeah,” Davis replied, according to Rob Pedregon, an airport police spokesman. Davis then turned to his fellow traveler and asked, “Have you packed the explosives?”
Davis was arrested, imprisoned in Los Angeles County Jail and charged with making a false bomb threat at the airport.
Although charges against him were later dropped, Davis’s “joke” is a warning to those who find the bomb threats ridiculous.
Hester says it is his job to report any such “joke,” even if he knows it is a joke. The flight attendants also don’t want to deal with red tape because of the silly comment, but they have to. So just say no when someone asks you if you’ve packed explosives instead of working on your tight top five.
In an email to Lifehacker, a TSA spokesperson confirmed that this is true for them as well:
I can only talk to the checkpoint. However, any comments suggesting that the traveler is in possession of weapons or explosives, or any type of threat, will be taken seriously and will cause the TSA to call law enforcement.
Refusal to answer questions
It’s extremely annoying that when you get on the plane, you cannot just check out. There is a lot of nonsense that needs to be solved first. For example, it doesn’t look like raising or lowering the tray will make a big difference in a plane crash, but the FAA requires maintenance personnel from you to make sure you do it. Hester described a man who was a strong, silent type who refused to answer questions when a minister approached him about his tray and refused to answer. Finally, Hester spoke to him, but there was no answer. Then the treasurer approached him:
“I need you to answer before take off,” she said. “Please, talk to me.”
However, the passenger chose not to speak.
Moments later, the captain announced that we were returning to the gate.
When the plane door opened and uniformed officers escorted the man out of the plane, he spoke for the first time.
“Do you think?” he asked.
In a perfect world, I would never have to talk to anyone, neither do I, but don’t check how far you can push the people working on your plane. The answer is not far away.
Don’t try to slip through the checkpoints
All these lines and invasive searches seem so unnecessary when they happen to you, but there are a large number of ordinary citizens who make them absolutely necessary. TSA Academy instructor Jason Pockett told Business Insider that the strangest part of his job is seeing all the ways people try to sneak past him, usually without malice, but definitely in a way that goes against the rules:
For example, he saw batteries glued to different types of Tupperware containers. “When it does, it just doesn’t look right. He has an unusual look, ”he said.
“Passengers will also try to put things there so that we do not want to carry out security checks. We had people who put delicate things like dirty laundry in our bags, just so we wouldn’t go in there. It’s just a bunch of random things that get put in there. To be honest, every day is a new experience. “
If you do not believe that people are trying to drag the most stupid things in the plane, you can check an entry TSA in Instagram, which lists some of the ridiculous things that people have tried to hide after a crazy trip.
Don’t get drunk (or admit yourself)
I’m a terrible flyer and usually I have to drink Xanax with a glass of chardonnay from the airport to get on the plane without crashing (don’t try this at home), but if you can’t hold back the booze, stay home. Although they sell fine liquor bottles on the plane, you will not be allowed on board unless you are clearly intoxicated. If you swear: “I wasted!” According to Smart Travel, they can call the cops from a TSA employee and arrest you. Moderate your consumption, or at least wait for the fourth vodka to come out.
Basically, at the airport, we have to behave as best we can, because the consequences can be dire. Or at least extremely uncomfortable. No one wants to miss their connecting flight because someone winked at them saying they had a bomb in their bag. Don’t be that guy.